Guys these days ... lol

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Guys these days ... lol
56
Mon, 07-12-2004 - 1:56pm
Gosh I feel like sexual customs are changing or something: I have a brand new relationship and we had sex for the first time last night. Without acting like it was the slightest bit unusual, when he was ready to orgasm he pulled out, yanked off the rubber, and held his penis about a foot or so over my face and masturbated all over me! Is this normal? I mean I have had a couple of men do similar things in the past but only when I knew them! I didn't so much mind as I was totally surprised ... there was nothing -mean- about it, he snuggled up afterwards and was totally friendly and cool ... I was like, ummm, OK ... one of my eyes was bloodshot this AM but otherwise I'm no worse for the wear ... still this is so wierd, I'm laughing b/c I guess I'm just not _au courant_ ....
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-12-2004 - 3:02pm
Wife & I never did this, but are still curious anyway: What is it that is liked about it? What are we missing out on? Appreciate an answer from more than we would from others from time to time who like to guess it for you, right? LOL!

 

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Avatar for imblushing
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-12-2004 - 3:11pm

Hi Sally,


>>>I feel like sexual customs are changing or something: I have a brand new relationship and we had sex for the first time last night. Without acting like it was the slightest bit unusual, when he was ready to orgasm he pulled out, yanked off the rubber, and held his penis about a foot or so over my face and masturbated all over me! Is this normal? <<<


OMG customs aren't changing THAT much. "brand new relationship" after that it would have been the worlds quickest relationship from beginning to END. lol


Sharon

A friend is the person who kn

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2003
Mon, 07-12-2004 - 3:15pm
Jeff, I'm an "actual guy who does do it" ... dunno, I think it's incredibly sexy with some women, not all. No particular reason why I say that. It just is. I'd be surprised if I haven't done it a couple/few hundred times at this point ... BUT I would never do it if the she in question wasn't totally cool with it. The only downside I can think of is, a few errant squirts now and then get all over everything after a few times ... clothes, pillows, hair, the floor, headboards, car seats, sunglasses, etc. etc. and you both need to have a good sense of humor about it when the cleaning lady gives a slightly odd look.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2004
Mon, 07-12-2004 - 3:21pm
it's not normal.i've been with several guys over the years,and never has any of them done that.it would break my trust.
Avatar for sugarbeat
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-12-2004 - 3:21pm
haven't read the other responses, but in my experience guys are becoming a bit more forward about things like this. they generally ask first about facials, although i've had something similar happen where he pulled out and finished on another part of my body. if you don't mind then not that big of a deal. if i were you though, my biggest concern would be transmission of stds. he did get his semen in your eye and i think stds can be transmitted this way since there is an exchange of bodily fluid.
Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-12-2004 - 3:49pm
Yes, I think porn is influencing a lot of men to do things they never used to. My DH has never done a facial, has never asked to do one and doesn't understand what the appeal is for some men.

But I guess it would only become a problem for you if that is the only way he can finish and you don't want to participate anymore.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Mon, 07-12-2004 - 4:31pm
I will agree with katmandoo here. I, too, think it's porn and how easily assessible it is now-a-days. My husband told me that he looked at a lot of porn during his first marriage (cuz he wasn't getting any at home) and he has admitted that he got a lot of ideas and fantasies from watching porn. In my first marriage and even in my dating relationships after my divorce, guys didn't just climax all over your face (and definitely not on the first time!). I've had guys who wanted to climax on my breasts and my rear end, but they didn't do that until further down the line in the relationship. Everything porn is SO readily available these days. You go on-line and boom! You can buy any sex contraption you want and it's delivered in a week. It's not just magazine subscriptions any more, but the videos, toys, machines, 900 numbers - it's crazy and can lead to sexual addiction, I think.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Mon, 07-12-2004 - 4:56pm
My husband tells me it feels erotic to him when he does that to me, but I know differently. For him (and possibly some other men, not all) it can be a control thing. If a guy is just going to climax on his partners face and they have both agreed to it, that is one thing, but when the guy holds your head and face tightly so you have no choice but to take it in the face or mouth, THAT is a control issue.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Mon, 07-12-2004 - 5:01pm
I don't know and can't say anything about the Kobe case, but I do know that I feel very violated having my husband climax all over my face. It's just me probably, but I can't help it. Sometimes I think if maybe he did it more gently or something that maybe it would be more sexy or enjoyable, but it's just gross, very rough and I can't imagine me looking sexy at receiving it at all!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-12-2004 - 5:05pm
According to other online message boards, including the ones on the Askmen website, you and Kat are very much not alone in this thinking.

Many of the men abroad have posted about how to deal with their women who seem to come up with these kinky new ideas for lovemaking. Either new sex ideas or risky locations are introduced, or new ligament-straining sex positions or an extra male partner or unusual props or foods/drinks, etc. In fact, some men were actually turned off by their women who 'requested' anal even.

They too credit porn much of the time because of the ideas that their ladies get from it all, . You should just hear what these guys have to say about some of the wild ideas derived from 'some' of those romance novels that the ladies have read, LOL!!...um, maybe not a good idea. ;)

Ideas/fantasies derived from porn seem to affect, if not educate to a certain degree, genders, but each couple will hopefully 'develop' their own unique ways to deal with it successfully.

;)

;)

 

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