had first time and now i need help

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2005
had first time and now i need help
5
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 1:53pm
i just had sex with my boyfriend for the first time a few days ago. i really love him and i have no regrets. it did hurt but i knew it was normal. now i dont know what i am supposed to feel for during sex. i have orgasmed during oral and solo sex, but now with him in me i dont know what i am supposed to be feeling for. please help.. ANYONE???
thanks
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 2:05pm

I'm not sure what you mean during intercourse what should you be feeling for?


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2005
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 2:26pm
so its ok to not feel the 'pleasure' that everyone talks about(with sex) the first few times? thank you
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2004
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 4:11pm

First, stop listening to "everybody". You're not everybody, you're you. Of course you're supposed to feel pleasure....the pleasure of intimacy. What you are NOT supposed to feel is pain. Make sure you're well aroused, and well lubricated......so that you aren't feeling pain. It's pretty hard to feel pleasure if it hurts!

It isn't "normal" to be painful, the first time, or anytime. It's painful because you're not properly aroused, and you're too dry, and that's caused by nervousness. Make sure you have plenty of foreplay, and use some extra lubrication till you learn to relax and enjoy what you're doing.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 4:45pm
You are supposed to feel pleasure, you shouldn't feel pain.

bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 06-06-2005 - 5:18pm

Your clitoris is the source of your sexual pleasure, not your vagina. Some women enjoy indirect stimulation of the clitoris via g-spot massage during intercourse or from the pulling on the vulva during thrusting, but the majority of women need direct involvement of the clitoris to orgasm.

And the vagina itself isn't anywhere near as sensitive as the clitoris, which contains double the amount of nerve endings found in the penis!

IF you can orgasm with direct stimulation through oral or manual massage, then incorporate that into intercourse and you should have no problems.

Ask you partner to continue masturbating you after penetration, or slip your hand down there and do it yourself and you should be able to go seamlessly from foreplay to intercourse to orgasm. Visit www.the-clitoris.com for more information.

Good luck and keep experimenting.




Edited 6/6/2005 5:20 pm ET ET by katmandoo2001