"hard" to talk about

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
"hard" to talk about
3
Sun, 01-28-2007 - 10:24am
I've been with my man over two years and our sex life has always been exciting, even kinky at times. My problem is that I feel inadequate that he doesn't get hard easily at all. Other men I've been with usually get hard by visual, or a little foreplay, sometimes just kissing. I seem to always have to give him oral sex for him to have an erection. Not that I mind it, I love to, but once in awhile it would be nice to not have to work so hard for it, for him to just get excited by normal means. It makes me feel that I am not enough for him, or that I am not desirable. We have talked about it and he says he's always been this way, that I do turn him on, that's just how he's wired. Is this possible? Help please!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Sun, 01-28-2007 - 10:43am

Of course it's possible and if that's the way he's always been then that's the way he is.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2004
Mon, 01-29-2007 - 4:03pm
I think everyone is wired differently. Even the same guy can be wired differently. Personally I think you are lucky in a way -- it can be a great, great pleasure to take the guy all the way from flaccid to a full erection. That doesn't happen too often, since usually from the kissing, etc., most guys are halfway there. But it's tons of fun when it does. I had a guy who would usually get the most amazingly stiff erections, but once every few times it didn't happen, and he would just be sort of half-hard for half an hour or so before it finally snapped to attention. Those are some really intimate moments!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Tue, 01-30-2007 - 7:19am
Thanks to both of you for your replies. I do find it exciting to feel him go from flaccid to erect in my mouth and I can't complain otherwise about our sex life at all, but like I said it would be nice every once in awhile to have him be ready for me without it. I guess it just boils down to my own insecurities. I'd love to hear from some guys about this.