Is he GAY??

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2004
Is he GAY??
36
Tue, 05-10-2005 - 9:10am

Ok, first of all, WARNING: this is probably going to be a little graphic.

Men, especially, I need YOUR opinion, PLEASE!!!

Ok, the other night when my bf and I were fooling around, we got to talking about threesomes. (just doing some dirty talk at first).

Well, he asked if I would ever be in to the whole two-girl thing, and I told him only if we get to do the two-guy thing.
Neither of us would actually do a threesome, but we just dirty talk each other sometimes about it.

Well, when we were talking about two-guys, he was saying he wouldn't want the other guy to have sex with me, etc. He then started mentioning something about me getting a strap-on dildo for HIM and that it can be very pleasurable for a man, but he has never done it. I guess he would want me to get a strap on and stick it in his a**?? (sorry, I told you it would be graphic)

Well, then, after he mentioned that, I asked him if he would do anything with the other guy if we had a two-guy threesome. He said he would probably let the other guy "suck him off" (blow job) because he didn't think it would be any different than a man doing it, and I was appaled, but didn't act it. I asked him then if he would have anal sex with the guy or if he would let the guy have anal sex to him? And he said YES PROBABLY!!!!

GROSS!

I asked him if he was serious, he said yes, and I asked if it would make him feel gay and he said, "no, it's pretty much the same thing". So he thinks its the same, and no big deal? He said he wouldn't kiss the guy, but still!

Should I be worried about this?? I would THINK it was just dirty talk, but then the next day, when nothing sexual was happening, I asked him if he really would do all that, and he said, "I probably would, if you wanted me to."

Guys, is he GAY??? I've always thought of him as a "manly man". And he seems VERY interested in women. Is he bi? If so, is there a way to find out for sure?? I am just very worried and freaked out by this now. Now, I don't have to worry about other WOMEN, but other MEN!!!!!

Please help.

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Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: jkp72004
Wed, 05-11-2005 - 6:20pm

How are you bullying? By insisting that we're all just deluding ourselves and because YOU may be bi-curious or bisexual, and since others are, that we ALL must be, to a degree. I think I've, and others, have very clearly said that that's not necessarily so.

Have a nice day yourself.




Edited 5/11/2005 6:23 pm ET ET by katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2004
In reply to: jkp72004
Wed, 05-11-2005 - 6:23pm
I don't disagree that there's a spectrum...I'm disagreeing that MOST of us fall within the middle. Those articles are merely stating that there's a spectrum.
Imagination is more important than knowledge." (Albert Einstein )
Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: jkp72004
Wed, 05-11-2005 - 6:32pm

There was an interesting news article on the evening news about a recent test involving straight men, gay men and women.

Using male pheromones to determine the effect, if any, on the hypothalmus, they found that both gay men and women responded to the scents, while the straight men showed no increased brain activity. The hypothalmus is the center for sexual arousal.

This test showed a definite difference in the way that the gay male brain functions when exposed to subconscious sexual stimuli, as opposed to the straight.




Edited 5/11/2005 6:36 pm ET ET by katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2004
In reply to: jkp72004
Thu, 05-12-2005 - 2:11pm
Why don't you ease up on him? And why did you go snooping. Now you're looking for ways to make him gay. DH looks at harnesses and strap-ons for me to use on him. Does that make him gay?! NO! THE MAN LOVES HIS P*SSY! I think you're over-reacting and over-stepping some serious bounds here. Why don't you leave your boyfriend alone. If he was looking up MMF stories, perhaps he was doing it for you?! After all, YOU did SAY YOU WANTED THE MMF trio..He wanted a FFM trio. Maybe he got excited about you..Did you ever think about that?! No. You're too busy making him gay. That's just wrong.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2004
In reply to: jkp72004
Mon, 05-16-2005 - 5:23am


You asked him a set of leading questions, which he answered without thinking, on the spur of the moment. He thought he must answer you in a manner to turn you on, most likely his answers would be very different at a different time and context.

You went ahead and picked up clues, circumstantial and corroborative evidences, and "state exhibits".

You have painted yourself into this corner.

Sorry that this sounds harsh, but you are grown up. Theere must be a dozen way to get out this situation, you may know a few of them The simplest is this - just forget you had this conversation, and just carry on as before. You will see your fears are misplaced.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2004
In reply to: jkp72004
Mon, 05-16-2005 - 5:03pm

I have followed this conversation and agree with the PP. You asked alot of leading questions in a "dirty talking conversation" that you admittedly stated was not serious. Should he believe that you are a lesbian because you endulged in WWM convo with him? And during that converstation did it turn you on to think that you were turning him on? It is amazing the feelings we get when we are exciting our lover. Don't consider him gay simply because he was endulging in a fantasy you created. JMHO

Nikki

Nikki

Hot Wife to Courtney & SuperMom to David & Michael

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