He said "Why did i do that"???

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2006
He said "Why did i do that"???
8
Thu, 06-08-2006 - 1:30pm

Hey all,

A few days ago me and my man were in the moment and ended up having sex, which was great like it always is. When he "relieved" himself after 30 minutes of doing it, he said to me "why did you do that?". When i asked him why did i do what, he said "why did you make me come so fast?". I honestly dont know what i did to make him do that, but just think its him; not me. He told me that with all the other chicks he been with he would last a long time, but with me it doesnt. I dont know if i should be flattered and take it as a compliment or be guilty that he came so quick. I know its all based on him, but i just dont know how to inpterpert what he meant. I asked what he meant by "why did i do that?" and said "you know what you be doing and how you be doing it".

Okay, i think that the reason for him maybe coming so fast with me is b/c we have alot of history together. We've been friends for 6 years and just started dating this febuary. Even though we was friends, deep down inside we had feelings and wanted eachother b/c he told me and i told him. Nothin ever happened back than b/c he would either be with someone or vice versa. During the 6 years of us being friends, he had a baby with one of my ex-friend, which he never knew was my friend to begin with and i started dating his friend, which he ended up being my first. After all of that we started going out since neither one of us was attached. So im beginning to think that the reason why maybe he "relieves" himself quicker with me is b/c after 6 years of wanting me, he finally has me. Then again i could be wrong, i just dont know. When i kept asking him he wouldnt give me an answer by what he meant.

So from both a man & women's points of view, what do you think he meant by that comment "why did i do that?".

Nicole

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2004
Thu, 06-08-2006 - 3:55pm

>>>So from both a man & women's points of view, what do you think he meant by that comment "why did i do that?".<<<

Well as a guy I know how hard we are to decode but I will give you my best guess.

1) Just so you know great sex is wonderful so there are no negatives there.

2) He probable wanted to give you kind of a back handed complement by saying ,to the effect, you are so sexy, feel so good, and move so great that you can just push my buttons and make me cum.

3) We know that us guys do have some control (just a little) over that so it was in no way a condemnation.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2005
Fri, 06-09-2006 - 12:20am

I wouldn't take that remark as any kind of compliment, back handed or otherwise! He's doing the typical man thing......he can't control himself, so it must be YOUR fault!

And I definitely wouldn't want to hear what he was like with other women.....and if he'd said that to me, I'd have said "they must have been skanks!"

Avatar for sugarbeat
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 06-09-2006 - 1:08am
i agree that it was a back handed compliment. and when it feels good physically and emotionally he's not likely to last as long...although 30 minutes to me is a good night ;). and 6 years of build up might have something to do with it too (you didn't mention how long it's been since you started having sex). overall though, i wouldn't over think this one.
Avatar for ukgirl82
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2005
Fri, 06-09-2006 - 12:50pm

"He's doing the typical man thing......he can't control himself, so it must be YOUR fault!"

That makes it sound like a negative thing and I'm not sure thats how he meant it. I know my fiance has said that he used to have more control with other women (and believe me, they weren't just "skanks") but with me, he doesn't last as long. And I don't mind knowing that... I like knowing I have such an effect on him that no woman ever has. Occasionally after orgasming, he'll give an amazed sigh and say something like "how do you that to me?" or "how do you make me cum so easily?" I'll just laugh or smile knowingly ;-)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2006
Fri, 06-09-2006 - 1:30pm

Thank you all for your response and i dont really take much as an insult. What you said your fiance says after he comes like "how did you do that?" or "how did you make me cum so easily?" is exatcly what he said the last time we did it. This is the scenario

He said: why did you do that?
I said: Do what?
He said: you know what you did and how you be doing it.
I said: what are you talking about? what did i do?
He said: make me nut so fast.
I said: I did that?
He said: dont act dumb, you know you did.
I said: well if i did, i did. I must have that killer then lol.

After i said that he just looked at me crazy, like it was ALL my fault for his quickness. I tend to take it as a compliment since no other chick he been with made him cum that quick and i do think some of them were skanks. He finally just made a right & smart choice finally choosing me.

Thank you all for your feedback and advice.

Nicole

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Sat, 06-10-2006 - 7:10pm
I guess that it's all good. You must be doing something that pushes his buttons just right and makes him cum fast - he's so amazed by whatever it is that he can't understand that you don't know exactly what it is that you're doing. Another thing too, if he's really into you and has wanted you for years then he probably feels really comfortable and aroused when he's with you. With the other girls he may not have had the emotional bond that he has with you. That would make him think you and everything was sexier and make him cum faster too. I think that it's funny that you're just doing whatever you do and he can't understand that it's probably about him and not really anything that you're doing!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2006
Sat, 06-10-2006 - 8:24pm

Yes i do personally think its funny also. We've been having sex ever since March and all the other times we did it he never said anything, but i guess now all of sudden he just decided to spit it out. I honestly think he didnt even mean to say it out loud since he looked embarrassed when he said it and probably thought i didnt hear when i asked him what he meant since he didnt wanna explain himself. Im glad to know i have such an affect on him when NO other girl he has been with as had that kind of affect. I had asked him a while back before we started going out how many girls has he actually had sex with and how long did it take to have sex with them. He said "only 7 & it didnt take me 6 years to do it with them"(i thought it was more than 7 from how he acted). So to know that im number 8 makes me feel like number 1 to make him feel like that when we do it.

What kind of makes this story even more funny is with the last two relationships i was in both of my ex-SO said "why do i do that?" or "why do you have that kind of affect on me?". I guess i either that killer in the bed or the personality in the head lol. Wither way im happy with what he said and am flattered even if it was a backhanded compliment.

Thanks for all the feedback.

Nicole

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2005
Sun, 06-11-2006 - 3:19am

Do you climax during InterCourse? If yes, can you feel yourself contract when he's inside you? Every body is different but it sounds to me that your contractions put him over the edge. During masturbation, I feel every contraction, but that's not the case with vaginal orgasms - I can definately feel the orgasm, but not always the contractions. However, he can feel every one of my orgasms and sometimes he doesn't last past the first one, though usually he can last until my third. When he's in the mood to make it last forever he'll actually stop moving just to prolong how long he'll last - I love it when he's inside for 30+ minutes.

So I'd take it as a compliment, because IMO it means his other partners never climaxed vaginally. Also, IMO it may mean that you two are just a perfect fit. Enjoy it all!