Help! One nighter that ended in mess...

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2008
Help! One nighter that ended in mess...
4
Sat, 02-09-2008 - 1:18pm
literally..ok I will sum this up quick, I had a one nighter with my boss-yikes. AND to top it off I got my period in the middle of it making a mess of the crisp white sheets in his hotel room!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was really drunk and acted like I didnt see it but now I am SO embarrased! Has anyone ever had this happen to them? Please help me feel better cause I am still cringing after 2 days!!!!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Sat, 02-09-2008 - 2:18pm

Sorry to hear that things went... badly.

What to do? So much of it depends on what ever it is that you have with the boss outside of the sex, and what sort of guy he is.

If he has an ego and it was casual random sex and he was just out to nail his subordinate then things could go badly and go badly at work too. He's not going to be impressed by either the blood or the drunkenness or your lack of memory.

If he's actually emotionally attached to you and really likes you then it's likely to go better for you. Still hideously embarrassing but he'll make allowances because he likes you.

If he mentions it I think that you are best to handle it in a mature fashion, make a very short apology like "I'm sorry about the other night, things didn't go well" and move on. If he doesn't mention it or act like anything has happened then I don't think that you should either because he clearly doesn't want to.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Sat, 02-09-2008 - 4:32pm

Welcome to the board, lovethesunandsand.

I think I agree with Westridge -- don't mention anything unless your boss brings it up.

Are you more embarrassed that you bled on the sheets, that you were drunk, or that you had sex with your boss to begin with? Where do you want this to lead in the long run? Those answers might make a difference of how I would handle the situation too.





iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2004
Sat, 02-09-2008 - 9:18pm

I've posted in other places around I-Village of how the natural "flow" of life- a woman's period, is a natural part of life, and it is a male dominated culture that has forced a guilt-trip on women. Menstruation was considered impure and women had to be removed from the culture until she was "pure" again. It also has partly to do with how women were always viewed only as sperm catchers and their jobs were to get pregnant again and again- so bleeding was a sign of failure. Strange how guilt is still around, as I see in your faking being drunk.


There is no reason to have guilt over this. Did you sleep on those sheets or ask the front desk to send clean ones? This could even add to your embarassment. I think you're worried about your reputation with your boss and whether this relationship will continue. If it is more than a one night stand? If it is, I don't think your period will change that- there will be plenty more period issues over the years, but if this is to last, it will get through this.


Best wishes.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2007
Sun, 02-10-2008 - 12:00am

I think you should just go in on Monday, shut the door and talk with him about what happened. Not the period issue...but the fling itself. You two need to agree to move on and never talk about it again or to