Herpes=Dilemma
Find a Conversation
| Sat, 09-24-2005 - 8:55pm |
I met this guy and when we were having a convo about STD's, I asked him if he had anything. He told me "yes, I have genital warts" then he said "naw I'm just kidding." A few days later, I asked him the same question again and once again he said "I told you I have genital warts" then he said "naw, I'm kidding." Then I brought up Michael Vick and told him that herpes is scary and that it is something I do not want. I also told him that one of my friends has herpes and said it's painful. Well he replied with "herpes isn't that bad." When I asked him how did he know, he said "I don't...I'm just saying, it can't be that bad."
the first time i gave him oral sex his penis was smooth and "normal". This was about 4 weeks ago. Then 3 weeks ago, he started acting weird...he didn't want to have sex (we've never had sex), he didn't want to really see me, etc. I couldn't figure out why...I figured bc he was seeing other girls. Then this week he suddenly changed and wanted to start seeing me again.
Thursday night when I went down on him to perform oral sex, he had a bump that was hard on the side of his penis. That's when I figured that maybe it was warts or herpes.
So I told one of my close friends that I had a feeling this guy had an STD and he told me that he has heard the same things and that he has given herpes to other girls on campus. I also told one of my other friends and he said "oh, that's why ______ was mad at him last year and just disappeared." This girl has herpes, and she use to mess with him.
Now it's time for me to confront him about it, but I don't know how. Any tips? Also, I still would like to be with him but I don't want to have sex....whereas he would want to have sex....I just would like to know how I could tell him that I heard he had herpes and for him to be honest with me

If it were me, I wouldn't have anything to do with the guy.
Why are you playing games with this guy? If you even SUSPECT that he has herpes, then you need to tell him to get a test, and show you the results. If he thinks it's nothing, and he thinks it's a joke.....he's SOOO wrong.
Also, are you under the impression that you can't get an STD from oral sex? You CAN! And you can get oral herpes if he's got it. Herpes isn't just painful, it's life altering. You will have it for the rest of your life. It can make you prone to cervical cancer, among other things. It can cause big problems with childbirth: Infants exposed to the herpes simplex can experience brain infection, seizures, prolonged hospitalization, mental retardation, and death if the infection takes hold. Here's more interesting information on it: http://www.herpes.org/
This isn't just some inconvenience....this is important. Don't even touch this guy again until you see the test results for yourself, and with all him hemming and hawing, I don't know if I'd even trust that. I wouldn't put it past him to fake some results!
If you hurt his feelings, OH WELL! Even if he doesn't have it, he's an idiot for "joking" about it. It is NOT a joke!
Okay, this is YOUR health and a life-long STD you're talking about here! WHY are you even still intimate with a person you have ANY doubts about at all? What's the dilemma?
Any person who would expose a partner to an STD without their knowledge should be avoided at all cost. Let's hope that you don't end up with warts on your lips now. Get tested and leave this guy alone!