How can I last longer?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2005
How can I last longer?
9
Sun, 07-02-2006 - 3:11pm
OK, so DW and I have sex about 1-2 times a month (and thats a whole different story) but when I have begged enough to get her to play, I can only last like 10 minutes. My thoughts are we don't do it enough to keep me from getting excited too fast but shes not convinced.
So how can I make myslef last longer or does it really matter being shes not into it anyway and just lays there?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-22-2002
Sun, 07-02-2006 - 5:34pm
Do you masterbate? I make love to my wife more often then you, however, I do find I last longer if I masterbate earlier in the day.
GolfDognut
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2002
Mon, 07-03-2006 - 8:20pm

Hi TM,


Well I know masturbating more won't make any difference, as you already have to do it a lot in your current situation :(.

 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2005
Mon, 07-03-2006 - 9:10pm

Hey, thanks for the response, X! I appreciate it.

Everything seems to work well and I've never had any problems, just want to go longer than the 10 minutes each time. I have hit longer a few times but then the wife starts getting tired so I have to wrap it up... :P

I do appreciate your ideas and will try them and think about the others...

TM

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Tue, 07-04-2006 - 2:11am

Sheesh. What a pic to accompany your siggy. Might have to take a cold shower now.... ;-)

To the OP,
Some would say that 10 minutes of intercourse is pretty respectable. FWIW, the "average" is less than that. I definitely think that the lack of frequency would be a contributing factor but unless you magically start having more sex then there is probably not a lot that you can realistically do about it. I suppose that you could masturbate more so that you don't have quite the same "urgency" to cum when you do have sex. How about giving your wife more foreplay and extending the sessions in that way? She might even be able to have a couple of orgasms from the foreplay and that should put her well on the way towards being satisfied with "only" ten minutes of intercourse.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2002
Tue, 07-04-2006 - 5:45pm

>>>>Sheesh. What a pic to accompany your siggy. Might have to take a cold shower now.... ;-)<<<


Not to blow my own trumpet or anything, but I think my siggie is damn sexy hehe.


To TM, glad I gave you some ideas to think about :).

 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2005
Wed, 07-05-2006 - 9:11am

Hi, Tampa,

I really hope that I am wrong but your message reminds me of a lot of the emotions and behaviors that were a part of my first marriage. It was an 11 year disaster. Marrying too young was a big mistake (for me). A couple of things in your message jumped out at me.

"OK, so DW and I have sex about 1-2 times a month (and thats a whole different story)"
>>>That's a sign of something that masturbation and foreplay are not likely to correct. I'm sure these suggestions were meant to be constructive and could have some positive effects but they aren't, in my opinion, going to solve the problems with which you are dealing. There's something really wrong with your marriage that you clearly don't want to think about much less share. So what's really going on?

"but when I have begged enough to get her to play,"
>>>Yikes. In a good relationship, a man doesn't need to beg a woman "to play". I learned between marriages that women are as enthusiastic about sex (or moreso) than most men. It sounds like your relationship is in serious trouble.

"I can only last like 10 minutes."
>>>Congratulations. That puts you in the top 20% of men in the US.

My thoughts are we don't do it enough to keep me from getting excited too fast but shes not convinced.
>>>What does DW offer in the way of support and understanding? What suggestions does she have?

So how can I make myslef last longer or does it really matter being shes not into it anyway and just lays there?
>>>"Just lays there"? TM, that's not "the norm". I think the ladies here can bear that out.

As I said at the outset, I hope I'm wrong but "having been there and done that", I think you need to seek some counseling and soon.

I wish you the best of luck.

David.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2004
Wed, 07-05-2006 - 11:11am

I agree with David on the counseling...it may help.

But I also want to add that 10 minutes makes you a king in my book.
I have learned to become very good orally and manually because at best I may last 1-2 minutes of penetration.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2004
Wed, 07-05-2006 - 12:42pm
If you want to delay ejaculation, simply keep your testicles pulled down. Guys have to pull them up to orgasm. A thumb and forefinger will keep those pesky "boys" from unloading.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2004
Wed, 07-05-2006 - 1:18pm
I've heard of the keeping the testicles from rising thing. But I can't seem to find a comfortable way of doing that without pulling out. :(
My Gf does do that to me when giving me a BJ sometimes though. Oh sweet torture ;p