How many partners is TOO many?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2004
How many partners is TOO many?
27
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 10:45pm
Over the past year, I have nearly doubled my sexual partner count...and I am wondering, how many is too many?! I'm not sure what it is, but suddenly I am finding myself in one after another sexual situation...and often I am the one essentially making it happen! I am not trying to make any of these people my boyfriend - in fact, I have had a number of one-night stands recently that I am completely okay with. BUT, I am starting to feel that perhaps it's gotten a bit out of hand. I'm not sure if I am simply worried about what other people will think, or if I just hate the idea that I will (out of necessity) have to lie to any future partners about how many people I've been with. I basically feel okay about what I've been doing (not that I necessarily want to continue like this) - but how many partners is too many? Is there such a thing? What do men think about this topic?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2007
Sat, 09-29-2007 - 8:39pm
For women, especially those below 30, a high number is not an accomplishment as it is for men. Men have to work to be able to pick up women to have sex with. Approach her, talk to her, buy her drinks, tell her things she wants to hear..etc, and even then she may get up and leave. A woman only has to say yes.



I read somewhere, (no offense intended, it's only a joke) - women are like trash bags. If she puts herself out there she will get picked up

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-26-2004
Sat, 09-29-2007 - 10:08pm

What number is too many?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2006
Sat, 09-29-2007 - 11:42pm

You keep repeating over and over that YOU are fine with it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2007
Fri, 10-05-2007 - 9:39pm

I am in my late 20's and I don't think you have to worry about it.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2007
Fri, 10-05-2007 - 10:04pm
You have how many you have. It's the way it is. You can't go back and change it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2005
Fri, 10-05-2007 - 10:16pm
When I turned 21 I cut loose. I did things that were reckless, dangerous, and immature. I also probably quadrupled my sex partner total. I'm not ashamed of my past, and if my partner were to demand details I would probably provide them. But - I am purposely vague about that time in my life and I think that is fine. I don't think most people are comfortable hearing that their current SO has been with 100+ people (or whatever high number) in the past. I haven't asked my SO for an exact number, he hasn't asked me. It's in the past. If you are feeling guilty or uncomfortable with your "numbers" then you should take a step back and think if this is making you happy, or if there is something else behind it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2006
Sat, 10-06-2007 - 12:49am

I don't think you can put a definite number on it, but I have a story about this.

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