Husband attacked me last night!
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| Mon, 04-30-2007 - 9:56am |
Seriously. Last night right when I was just falling asleep my husband rolled over in bed and literally attacked me. Now my husband is a cop but he ahs never done anything like this before. I was half asleep so i actually didn't know if it was my husband or someone else. He didn't hurt me thankfully. I did up crying when he was done and slept on the couch for a little while though.
In one move of the hand he had completely ripped off my bra and underwear. I was a little shocked. I have been sexually assaulted so my defense was quickly rising. He started to finger me and hold me down. He was extremely rough and my DH is the most gentle man I know. I ended up screaming for him to stop. After about 10 minutes he rolled over and fell asleep. It was apparent to me that he had no idea what he did.
I asked him this morning if he remembered "messing" with me last night and he said no. I want to believe him because I know he would never hurt me. It just really scared the crap out of me. I don't want to be scared of my husband. Has anyone ever experienced this with a partner before? Do you think it could happen again? Any suggestions would be appreciated.
Thanks ~Erika~

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Hi Erika,
Sorry this happened to you. I know you said you asked him if he remembered messing with you, but did you tell him what happened?
My DH has some unusual dreams and is known to do bizarre things in his sleep. Usually if I prompt him about them, he does have a faint memory of them happening. If he remembered on his own, he would probably wonder whether it was a dream or a reality. When he does things that startle me, I usually wake him up and let him know it's time to get back to sleep. Otherwise, I can usually tell him to go to sleep without really waking him up. Most of the time, it's prompted by a dream that he is having. He's never been overly agressive or done things that were hurtful to me, but he does startle me at times.
Since you say your DH is a cop, perhaps he is having some weird dreams induced by work. You might want to ask him about that, tell him what he did, and give him a chance to talk too.
There is a condition called *sleep sex* or *sexsomnia* where the person does not know what he/she is doing.
Thanks for posting these Tish -- I'll have to check them out. I had never heard of such a thing.
I did have one scary occasion with my DH years ago. We went to the movies and saw "Misery". That same night, I woke up at about 3am while DH was standing at the foot of our bed -- with one of my feet in each hand! YIKES!!!! I woke him that time with "Oh, no you don't!" He has no memory of what prompted him to go there!
He's always saving me or doing something totally weird. Never anything sexual, so I doubt he has the same problem.
I would talk to him in person, not on the phone.
I agree with what Tish said. It's possible that he just couldn't talk about it at that time. I also think you probably need to have a bit more of a conversation than you could probably have on the phone.
See if you can find some quiet time to talk with him tonight.
He probably doesn't remember. One time DH was asleep and I was laying
in bed awake thinking about remodeling the house when all the sudden
he said "I need a horror"! and he reached over in his sleep grabbed my
head and put my face on his crotch and then he let go. I was in shock!
It was funny but it wasn't. I asked him and he didn't remember at all.
Your husband was probably having a strange dream.
Let him know it scared you and then let him talk to you about it.
If he knows he's done it and it scared you. Then he probably want do
it again.
Sorry that happened to you
Kareese
Ps. welcome.
my partner in the siggy exchange
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