I don't feel nothing with my new partner

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2003
I don't feel nothing with my new partner
2
Mon, 11-01-2004 - 2:32pm
Hello everybody.

About six months ago I met my new partner. We just moved in together recently. Since the firt time we had sex, It was not really great. I thought that maybe was it because it was the first time and he was little nervous or something, as the time goes by, unfortunately, our sex life hasn't improve at all. I think I have figured out what his problem is. He loves to received oral sex, and for him, that's what's sex is all about. He enjoys it too much, that is all he wants me to do when it comes to have sex. I have talked to him about this so many times, but nothings has changed. Ok, after I performed oral sex to him, and he tries to penetrate me, he looses about 50% of his erection so I don't feel any pleasure at all and I can't have an orgasm. He also gets tired very easily and sweats a lot. Ok, when I go back to perform oral sex to him again, then he regains his erection completly but then again he loses about fifty percent as soon he is inside me. This is very frustrating for me. He is a great man, however he doest not satisfy me sexualy, I' am really considering in ending this relationship, I just can't continue like this. He says he's really trying to make me feel good...I just don't know. I do believe he has a very bad habit, the only way he gets aroused is receiving oral sex. Any suggestions on this??

Thank you

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2004
Mon, 11-01-2004 - 2:49pm
Have you tried to use any "toys" for yourself? Like your partner using a vibrator or dildo on you so that you receive what you need? What are his feelings on performing oral sex on you? Other than the pure physical part of your relationship do you have feelings for him? I was in a two year relationship with someone who did not fulfill me sexually and on top of it he ended up giving me herpes. You mentioned something about his sweating, my ex slobbered so bad when we kissed that I could only kiss him when I was on top of him or else I felt like I was drowning. I could not talk to him about how he was not fulfilling me sexually because he would get defensive and we would end up in a fight. I think it's a good sign that your partner listens to what you have to say. Maybe some more creative ways of having sex would help, otherwise, you do need to end it because it won't get better unless he's willing to try harder to please you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2004
Mon, 11-01-2004 - 3:06pm
It's not as if you guys are married to each other. If it's not working out and you're not turned on and have tried as you say - it's most likely not gonna change. End it. Get the man and lover you need.