i have a question

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2006
i have a question
2
Tue, 07-25-2006 - 8:07pm

umm this might sound like a dumb question.. i don't know. But because Ive never had sex, i want to ask.

1. If you masterbate (just by rubbing your V and not actually going) does it lessen the pleasure of sex ..when u have it the first time?

2. When having sex does it feel nice throughout the whole process of when the guy is going in and out or does it only feel good when u reach orgasm?

Avatar for sugarbeat
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 07-25-2006 - 11:02pm

Masturbation does not lessen the pleasure of sex. I think it can only increase it because you will know what makes you feel good, and then if necessary communicate it to your guy. It's hard to compare clitoral stimulation and intercourse. But unless you are with a guy that knows what they are doing, it might be a bit anti-climactic. In some way you might think 'that's it? that's what all the fuss is about', but with time you will learn the nuances.

I never orgasm during intercourse, and neither do many of other women. There are few nerve endings in there, so as many people on the board have said you can mostly feel pressure or some pleasure if it hits your g-spot. Vaginal and clitoral stimulation are totally different. It's hard to describe the difference, but I can't say one is better than the other. I usually need both to feel satisfied.

I find it very difficult to discribe the vaginal sensation. Can anyone else on the board help out?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2005
Wed, 07-26-2006 - 12:36am

Sex is different for everyone, and "sex" is a LOT more than intercourse. Masturbation is sex done by yourself, and has nothing to do with sex with a partner. It's a way of exploring your body, and finding out what feels good to you, because everyone has different needs, and different things that feel good to them. People who are in sexual relationships may also masturbate occasionally, one has nothing to do with the other.
Masturbation has no effect on what you feel when you actually have sex. It's two different things.

You need to learn about your body. Your vagina isn't your main sexual organ, nor is it where most women get the most "pleasure". Masturbation is more about the clitoris, which is your real sexual organ....compared to a man's penis. Rubbing around the outside of the vagina isn't going to produce much pleasure for most women.

When having sex, you mean intercourse, does it feel nice throughout the whole process....hopefully yes. But the whole process starts long before intercourse with foreplay, and that also should feel nice, or more than nice, wonderful. Intercourse mainly feels like exactly what it is.....something going in and out of your vagina. If you want to know what it feels like, use one or two fingers, and try it. It will be similar to a penis.

Not everyone who is sexually active has orgasms. Most women take a while after becoming sexually active to have orgasms....and again, as the other poster said, most women, IF they have orgasms, don't have them from intercourse, they have them from foreplay which is manual or oral clitoral stimulation, as well as kissing, caressing, playing with your breasts and nipples....and anything else that feels good to you. It involves the WHOLE body, and the mind. If you learn to enjoy ALL the parts of sex, eventually you'll have orgasms, but don't think they just happen every time, they don't, especially for beginners.

It's very hard to describe what any part of sex feels like, because we're all different, and we all have different feelings. It depends on you, how ready and aroused you are, and how loving a connection you have with your partner, and how much your partner knows about how to please a woman. When you find the right man, and you have sex, it will be good, but how it feels.......you'll find out when you do it.

To learn more about your body, and your sexuality....go to www.the-clitoris.com