I made him a non-virgin(M)...
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| Wed, 11-17-2004 - 11:14am |
And sometimes I feel guilty about it. I'm crazy about him and he said
that I didn't pressure him into anything he didn't want to do. My best
friend said that I shouldn't feel bad. I'm clean of STD's and everything.
And he treats me like the princess that I deserve to be. I love him with
all my heart. But, I'm much more expierenced than he is. I've been with
four people. And they all treated me bad and cheated on me. And he's so
sweet and gentle. And is totally crazy about me. I don't know why i feel
so guilty. When I care about him alot. And vice versa. My best friend's says
it's a good thing. What do you all think? Am I supposed to feel bad for taking
my man's virginity? I'm a little confused by that. I guess because, the men I've
been with we're all expierenced to begin with...

If he was consenting and wanted to, then you have no reason to feel guilty.
I don't know why you feel so guilty about it. If he did it willingly and he gave his consent then everything is fine. He's probably really pleased that he gave up his virginity to you. Certainly it's better that he lost it in a caring relationship with someone that he cares for.
Are you feeling guilty because you just like him and don't love him and he likes you more than you like him?
Hello Country,
You sound like a very nice person and so does your boyfriend. It's so good after previous bad experiences to finally find someone who is warm, caring and loving. And he sounds like all those things and may more as well as honest. And it is that honesty that is him telling you that he loves you, is crazy about you and is comfortable with you - and who better to give his virginity to than someone he feels like that about?
I am sure you made him the happiest man alive by being with him and letting him give you that part of him. Just because you may be more experienced it doesn't make you any more responsible or him any less responsible, it was his choice to make and he made it and from the sounds of it, for himself, he chose someone truly special to give it to. =)
When I lost my virginity I remember really wishing that the man I was with was a virgin, he told me he'd slept with 3 women (as many do!) - it was only later I found out that actually he *had* been a virgin and I wish I had known. He did, however, tell me that he was so glad he gave it to me and wouldn't have wanted it to be with anyone else. That was over 3 years ago and he still says that. Your boyfriend loves you, he has told you he wanted it so there is no need for you to feel guilty but instead concentrate on how much he loves you to have given you that. You don't need to feel guilty for making him one of the happiest men alive! =)
Your friend is right, there is no need to feel guilty at all. Just keep telling yourself that it is what he wanted - and why he wanted it was because he's so in love with you. You may have felt in the past that it was the mens move to do it, or that it didn't matter as they were experienced too, but you're the first step for this man and he's chosen you so feel so happy and try and not let any feeling of guilt get in the way. If you need reassuring then try talking to him, I am sure he will reassure you and tell you exactly how wonderful it felt for him.
All the best, stay happy. =)
-x-Robyn-x-
Thanks to you all. I guess I'm just so scared of totally giving my
heart away to him. I love him. It's just that whenever I used to
open up to a man before. He would leave or cheat on me. My new
man just says that those people were crazy to have given up on
me. He's teaching me how to believe in love and to not give up.
He treats me like a princess. Buys me dinners, hangs out with
my friend's, met my family and I met his. He holds open doors
waits on me whenever I cook him something. Kisses me on the
forehead whenever I get upset. He is the sweetest boyfriend that
I have ever had. And I just don't know how to react to it. I guess
in a way that's why I feel guilty. Because, I feel like I don't
deserve someone as great as he is. Although, I know I do. And
I'm holding on to him.... :)
You are very welcome hon,
Tish is right. I have been in 2 pretty bad relationships that have lasted for the last 3 years, one took up a majrotiy of that - he was a lovely charming guy but was like Jekyll and Hyde and he really hurt me, so did the other person.
Now I have found someone else who treats me like you say your lovely boyfriend does. Sometimes I too wonder if I deserve him, I have to stop and pinch myself. I realise though that it was the men who treated me wrong in the past and I do deserve someone really sweet and want to be as lovely to him as he is to me and just keep going and stay so much in love.
It sounds like you've found a lovely person and I am sure you will get used to how he treats you without taking anything for granted (it's just magical!) and tell yourself you desevre this happiness for once and keep smiling girl.
Have the best time of your life. =)
-x-Robyn-x-