I used a TOY last night
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I used a TOY last night
| Sun, 01-02-2005 - 10:11am |
Last night I used a dildo on my wife why having sex. I started by massaging her and just petting her for a while. Then I started by giving her oral sex, mostly licking the clitoris. Then I stuck a dildo inside her. it was about an inch round and about 9 inches in lenth. after I put it in her and turned it on she said later said it hurt after about an hour. is this normal.
I liked putting it in her but she said she still preferes to have a real penis in her rather than a plastic item even though the plastic toy was 3 more inches and vibrateing. I would like to use it again but as for her she is not looking forward to it

Thats interesting. Only time I'd "like" to use a toy on the Mrs. is if I knew it would really please her. If its something that didn't really make her go wild, then I'd kinda be turned off by it myself as well.
The toy I got for her I mainly got for her to use on her own though anyway, so our situations are pretty different I suppose. That pain that occurs afterward that you're describing is actually my #1 reason for letting her have it 'on her own' as a matter of fact. Different couples do different things, right? :)
Is it possible that she herself isn't really use to the dildo, which would make it that much more impossible for you yourself to use it on her without any pain? I'm just guessing that the use of those toys that involve deep insertion would cause some pain, whether immediate or afterwards, pretty easily whether she is use to it or not because only SHE is able to tell what is and isn't so sensitive in there.
Perhaps we'll both learn from more experienced users with their replies.
C h a r a c t e r
above all else
Mr. Para
C H A R A C T E R
Most women would prefer the *real thing* above a toy.
Did you ask her "permission" before you did it? I can imagine that it DID hurt after an hour.....why did she let it go on that long? And I can also imagine that she's not looking forward to it again. You have some very skewed ideas of what women like, and how to please women. I think that you're trying to "out-do" those former boyfriends of hers!
You said that she told you she prefers a penis instead of that toy....even though it was 3" longer and vibrates! DUH!!! That just proves that size means nothing at all, and lets face it.......a vibrator doesn't do ANYTHING more in the vagina than a penis does, because there's so little feeling inside the vagina. If a vibrator is effective in any way, it would be on the clitoris, not inside the vagina.
If she doesn't like it, then why would YOU enjoy it? Evidently it's just for YOU....i.e.:you think because it's bigger, it's "better" than you? That would work, except your wife isn't interested, and why would you get pleasure from what she doesn't like??? I think you need to get yourself some sexual counselling because you have a lot of sexual misconceptions and hangups about her past. If you can't get beyond these things, you're never going to be happy.
It was not inside her for an hour. It was inside for about 5 to 10 minutes, and i did ask for her permission first. after we used it we had regular intercourse and then when we finished it hurt after we had been finished for about an hour. I do appreciate everyones imput becuase it seems to a degree I am trying to compete with her past. Hopefully this board helps me with that
Thanks
You should not compare yourself or try to compete with anyone from her past and neither should she.
I'm not surprised that it hurt afterwards. If she's not used to the size of the vibrator she can feel a bit stretched. Nine inches is a pretty big vibrator and you can hit a few internal organs if you're not careful too. Although they are often soft and flexible they still aren't as soft as a penis especially if you move them in and out forcefully. She may have not been lubricated enough either - especially if she was side-tracked thinking about using it this first time with you rather than just being fully aroused and enjoying it. Combine all those things and she's probably a little stretched, a little chaffed, and a little bruised from it.
For these reasons, full inserting a vibrator is not always the most effective and enjoyable way to use it. Plenty of women enjoy the vibrations on the outside and the only the first inch or two of penetration. You'll just have to test-drive it with your wife a few times and find out what she likes best. Try encouraging HER to use it on herself and perhaps you can watch and massage her body or kiss her as she uses it on herself. Whatever you do, I'd suggest staying away from penetrating her with it and just use it externally for the next couple of times.
Another way of enjoying the vibrator is to use it during intercourse. Turn it on and press it against her clitoris and 'sandwich' it between her body and your body as you penetrate her with your penis. I think that you will find that the vibrations can be very enjoyable too!