Intimidated by bf...advice please
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| Mon, 04-18-2005 - 12:28pm |
Hi
Some things my bf has said lately have really got me worried, as well as something I found on his computer that makes me think he may be bi sexual. I was on his computer yesterday on google and I was typing in something on google that started with a "b" and the drop down menu came up with all the other searches he's done that have started with a "b" - on the list was "bi sex" and "bi curiousity". Also, he told me before that he has had 3 threesomes in the past and 2 of those were with another guy and a girl.
It doesn't bother me if he is bi, I was just curious....
But the things he has said, well he is very adventurous, at least he says he is. We've been together for almost 3 months and the most adventurous sex experience we had was sneaking down to the storage locker room in our condo building and having sex there. He is away this week and called me last night and wanted to have phone sex which I am totally not into, but I did it anyway for him. (Faking most of it, but he didn't know!). He was very graphic in telling me everything he wanted me to do, making me wonder how many times he's actually had phone sex with someone. And then he went on to tell me how he wants to fulfill all my fantasies and he wants me to be his naughty girl. He went on to tell me he wants to take me out on our balcony and have sex with me so people can see and how he wants to dress me up sexy and take me out to show me off and have me flirt with other guys and brush up against them to drive them crazy, etc. He wants me to talk dirty to him while we have sex, but once we are out of the sex mode, he is a normal guy. This side of him only comes out during sex. I'm just confused- does he really want all this stuff or is just part of "the talk" while he is in the mood? Is there anything I should be worried about?
Thanks

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>>I'm just confused- does he really want all this stuff or is just part of "the talk" while he is in the mood?<<
Probably a bit of both - it's definitely exciting for him to talk about while he's turned on. It'd probably be exciting for him if you were to carry out these fantasies with him - but maybe not as exciting as when he's talking about it. When you fantasize your mind controls EVERYTHING. In real life, you can't control everything and can't have it all go exactly the way that you want it to. I'd guess that he'd probably like to give it a go, but he may realise that it might not be as exciting as thinking about it.
>>Is there anything I should be worried about?<<
Not really. As the others have said, just because he wants to try these things doesn't mean to you even have to be interested. If there is something that you don't want to try, be sure to tell him. Don't feel guilty for saying 'No'.
The only other thing I'd mention is if he is bisexual and says that he wants a third person in the bedroom. Think carefully about that. It can be a real can of worms. But if that ever eventuates come back and ask for some more advice before doing it.
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