ivillage abusive to women?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2006
ivillage abusive to women?
12
Wed, 11-29-2006 - 11:34am

I saw this technique for oral sex on this web site:

Back Him Up

As he's getting undressed, lie on the bed with your head where your feet usually go, rather than perched on the pillows. As he walks toward the bed, slide down so your head is hanging over the bed, grab his buttock cheeks and take his penis into your mouth. Your head should be off the bed as you give him oral sex upside down. He's ultimately in control of the thrusting, but you can use your hands as a guide to speed him up or slow him down. Not only does this look sexy, but it also opens your throat wide so you can take in more of him without gagging.

I've seen this act cited as one of the common acts in porn that is degrading to women; yet, it is being promoted as a sex trick on this site. What do you think?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Wed, 11-29-2006 - 2:16pm

I see nothing wrong with it as long as the woman is fine with it and I certainly wouldn't say iVillage is abusive to woman by having that on their site.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-07-2006
Wed, 11-29-2006 - 2:42pm
I don't think that ivillage is being 'abusive' to women. There are a lot of things that happen in porn that regular people do and don't feel abused. Also, ivillage is not suggesting that everyone should do this it's just a suggestion for persons seeking difference. There are a broad range of information on here - there are people who don't believe in oral sex period, there are persons who don't believe in WOT (a bit exaggerated), everybody is different and it's up to you to decide what you will do and will not do.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2000
Wed, 11-29-2006 - 3:17pm
The situation you describe has the woman in some degree of control, where she pretty much invites him into her mouth, and can use her hands to control his pace. I'm sure if she was seen as pushed into it, and basically had to lay there and be orally pounded it'd be something else altogether. It's all about the context and what you're comfortable with.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2005
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 12:37am

What's "abusive" about a suggestion? If YOU feel it's "degrading" to women, then just don't do it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2006
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 1:27am
I'm not necessairly saying its abusive to women, what I am saying is that ivillage "suggests" many sexual proactices that the media faults porn for when they say porn is degrading to women. So how can porn be criticised for being abusive to women when contributors to this forum, both in articles and in contributions by members to the forums, describe, suggest, and fantasize about these same practices; i.e., facials; multiple men; etc. For that matter, porn doesn't even go as as far as many of the fantasies on these forums or in the literature; ie., rape fantasies, bestiality, etc., although cleary women fantasize about these acts.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 1:51am

I think that you're missing the point.

When the media criticises porn for being abusive because it is "characterized by physical or psychological maltreatment". They are rarely talking about specific sexual acts being inherently or automatically abusive.

Not one sex act that you care to mention is abusive if the participants are willing, and partaking of their own free will without duress.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2005
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 2:02am

Whatever two consenting adults do in the privacy of their own home is their business, and no one else's. The operative words here are "consenting" and "adults".

One woman's "degrading" is another woman's pleasure. The "media" is there to sell newspapers or magazines...or in the case of TV, to sell commercials. Adults can think for themselves, and if something offends them, that's up to them.....and they shouldn't do it. Obviously, not all adults are offended or feel degraded by porn, since it's a multi-billion dollar industry, some of which is produced specifically for women.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 7:47am

Again what one person feels degraded by another person doesn't.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2006
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 8:11am
I have experienced the reverse of this act with my delicious wife and have yet to feel degraded because of it.
once.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Thu, 11-30-2006 - 10:25am

Yep, we've done it in reverse too and


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

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