just sex

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2005
just sex
4
Sun, 07-10-2005 - 1:09am

I am single again...for the first time in 15 years. I have no desire for a romantic relationship at all. BUT I do miss sex. How do I find just a sex buddy? Is it even possible? I am a divorced mom, I don't have time for a fulltime man. Every guy I meet is looking to marry the next woman they go out with. I know it is a strange question. I am not sure if I even make sense.

Kim

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2004
In reply to: kan797s
Sun, 07-10-2005 - 1:46am

What you're looking for is a "Friend with Benefits" (FWB). Not impossible to find, but most women can't really handle that very well. We get "attached", and want more.

I don't understand "every man wants to get married"! Most men that I know don't WANT to get married, they're looking for a FWB!

The next guy you meet who says he wants to get married, if he's decent, and you like him, tell him you don't want to get married, but suggest an arrangement. Make sure you both understand the ground rules, too!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
In reply to: kan797s
Sun, 07-10-2005 - 7:44am
At the risk of stating the obvious, I'd like to add that you should keep this discreet. Don't let your kids see you doing this - role modelling is so important for our kids.
Dress Up Games, Doll Makers and Cartoon Dolls @ The Doll Palace
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2005
In reply to: kan797s
Sun, 07-10-2005 - 11:27am

When you're a single mom, that is not a strange question, nor a rare desire. I would suggest you take a look @ on-line dating sites to prepare yourself for what the world has to offer nowadays. Lav***ight has a section specifically for "intimate encounters". Hopefully, you have alrady done your homework and you know to meet them somewhere public, tell a friend where you are going and as much info as know about him, name, car make/model, address/phone (if given). This the very practical reality of your desire.

What GTB wrote is truly more your reality. It's not an easy world to enter, nor stay in. You need to be absolutely sure of your needs/wants and you shouldn't expose your kids in any way - which means logistics may become an issue. There are many (millions maybe) men out there that would love to hear that you're only interested in sex, however, once you've got him, your viewpoints/feelings may change and you need to be very prepared for that.

As a woman who left a 17 yr marriage, sex was all I wanted for many years, however, I wasn't brave enough to walk up to a perfect stranger and whisper "do me". It can be done, but it's not the easiest thing to do, especially for a female. Good luck!

As an alternative, have you considered toys. If sex is really all you want then solo sex with toys maybe wonderful. I found it fulfulling without all the BS,plus I got it as much as I wanted, whenever I wanted.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2005
In reply to: kan797s
Sun, 07-10-2005 - 12:20pm

Thank you for all of your replies to my question. I definately do not want to expose my kids to a new man anytime soon. I do masterbate (a lot) but I miss having real sex with a real man.
You have been very heplful! Thanks again.

Kim