just wondering...
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just wondering...
| Fri, 02-16-2007 - 6:21pm |
Hi all...
The other night me and my SO tried the doggy style position but it just didn't seem to work he couldn't stay in me but I wouldn't say he was small so I just dont understand why this happend, could it have been something I was doing? Also is it usual for guys to not come through oral sex because I was doing it for quite a while and got quite bored and lost confidence because he just didn't seem to be enjoying it.
Any advice is welcome
Thankyou
x

I realized that I was tensing up because of being on my arms and legs for a while, so my SO couldn't get his penis far enough in me for it to stay. Have him try back rub/massage first to get you relaxed, then inserting a few fingers to get you used to it. Foreplay is key here! Also, if staying in that position is tense, try leaning on your forearms or biceps to shift the weight down.
Hope that helps!
First question: No, it was nothing YOU did wrong. You were doing what you needed to do....giving him access. It's up to HIM to get a rhythm going, and not pull out so far that he falls out. He can hold onto your hips if that helps him.
Second question: It's not "usual", but it's also not "UNusual". Some guys just aren't able to finish that way. Maybe he was just nervous. If you get tired and bored, then it's time to quit....and finish him another way. It has nothing to do with you, and if he didn't seem to be enjoying it, then HE should have told you to stop, and moved on to something else.
It sounds like neither of you is very experienced. Good sex takes time and practice. If a man can't finish, that has nothing to do with you, what you're doing or not doing, it's all under his control, and if he's nervous, sometimes it just doesn't work.
As far as rear entry it can depend on several things like the alignment. He may need to get lower in relation to you. You can also try varying your position from being on your elbows or even being more upright by holding on the the headboard. Find what works for you.
With oral sex do you want him to cum in your mouth or not. If not then that might be on his mind. Have you communicated to him what you are willing to do or want. Many times it is hard for the woman to keep up with a certain rythym or technique long enough to get me over the edge. Could he be holding back to finish with IC. If oral is the main course you need to figure out his triggers. For me I want to know her intent is to make me orgasm otherwise I will treat is as foreplay and try to hold back. If I know she intends to make me orgasm then I mentally prepare to allow it to happen easier and quicker (I know jaw will get tired and she will lose her enthusiasm). Also how she goes about it should be different than if it meant as foreplay.
For me this is how it works best. She lets me know that she is using oral to make me orgasm. Instead of rushing straight to preforming oral she would get me ready with some manual stimulation. Then when the time is right she would start the oral. The change in sensation from manual to oral is wonderful and she can work me towards an orgasm. By my knowing her intent I can let myself move towards that goal. Although I might like it to last much longer I am considerate of her and move it along so that her jaw does not become sore.