Ladies- Do your friends know his size???
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| Thu, 09-21-2006 - 6:21pm |
Hi Everyone.. Ok before you start replying that this is just another post about penis size... well ok it is but in a different way.. we all know many (if not most) of us guys are size focused much to the confusion or amusement of you ladies.
But we also know that when the girls get together, more info and juicy detail gets discussed than you might otherwise lead on. Other boards here would confirm that one!
So my question is.. When talking with your girlfriends, Do you ladies talk or tell each other about your man's size, whether positively or negatively. Or in more of a general way, have you talked about the notable ones in your past you miss or ones that you just encountered?
Then the follow-up question is that have you ever increased the size more than it really was for the fun of the story?
Basically.. I want an inside view into how much the girl talk really involves size discussion (even if you would make the claim that Size doesn't matter to you!!)
This is open to all you ladies, younger or older, married or single. It doesn't have to be a recent discussion.. just any type of this discussion in your experience.
Look forward to reading the responses.
Curiousniceguy.

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You said "It's not a matter of right or wrong really, just the comfort level and trust with whoever you're talking to that it won't get spread around."
And just how often does a 'secret stay a secret'? It can, but most of the time a leak occurs. There may be one person that each person knows and trusts to not spread gossip (and even that can turn out differently for some people), but when women are in a group chatting there is no way it will stay just among that group. Impossible. Most people are not good secret keepers. Unless the ex has moved far away, why wouldn't it matter? Word gets around. He still lives in the area. I'm not quite comparing it to doing what Britney Spears did to Justin Timberlake, and what Jessica Simpson did to her ex (Britney saying on camera the Timberlake has a worm for a penis, and Simpson saying she loved her ex despite his small penis and her barely being able to feel him during sex) but on a lower publicized level is it really much different?
And the part about it's not always negative about an ex, well, that can reflect onto a current husband or bf. If a woman is talking positive about how an ex was in bed, that implies her current SO doesn't matchup to her ex in sex. Sure, the current SO may be better then the ex in other areas -perhaps kinder, a better provider, more in common, etc, and it may be understood that just because the ex was better in bed that it doesn't matter as much as those other qualities they hear about your current SO, but most men still don't want it being said they are not as good in bed, no matter what. It's somewhat embarrassing. I wasn't just talking about size - anything positive or negative concerning sex.
You asked a poster about whether he thought it was ok for men to talk about a woman's breasts as she walked by, but not ok for women to talk about a man's bulge as he walked by. Personally, I don't see anything wrong wth it. Women checking out butts (and we know many women do look at guy's butts, and some will comment to a female friend next to them about his butt),bulges, looks, etc, is a natrual occurrance in my book. I think it's natural thing to do, if one is into to that. Some people are more observant, or more open about such as that. Some more reserve about it. Just because someone has a SO doesn't change nature's instincts. However, a line should be drawn:
This is where our minds recognise a difference, for that above paragraph is not the same as talking about an ex in bed or his penis size. If a woman likes to bulge watch it's not readily recognised as saying anything in particular about her ex's penis size. Probably not anyway. It's because it's a known instinct that people look at other people, and people have things that are appealing to them, and things not so appealing. It falls into that category. However, when a former ex's name gets brought up in a negative or positive way, it directly speaks about the ex, no two ways about it, and it can imply things about the current SO. And in case you're going to mention cases where one has an ex but no current SO - the implication isn't going to be as strong onto a future SO when the dating begins. At this point someone may wonder though, and they might ask. Example: "Does your new bf rock your world as much as your ex did?".
I only posed the question, because some men do not see the correlation (and yes, neither do some women)....there are many hypocrites amongst us! Hearing a man complain about women scruitinizing men's penis size and then in the next breath discussing a woman's breast or butt, their texture, firmness, size, or whatever, is hypocritcal.
And honestly, although there is a difference between discussing the parts of you SO and the parts of a passerbyer, in some sense they are "related." Let's say a man comments on a passerby woman's breasts--no harm, right? But what if the the woman has large breasts and his SO has small breasts? Isn't that still a reflection on his SO or an ex?
All and all...from my own experience, most women have an understanding between each other....and that is that penis size does not matter....and that it matters more to men, than women. If anything is mentioned between them, it is to "mock" that very concept (that size does matter to women). I have talked about sex with many women over the years, and penis size just never comes up. My conclusion is it really isn't important to women. If it were, it would have been in the forefront of our conversations.
Also, many women "empathize" about the situation. Most women do not like being scruitinized with respect to their bodies....so the last thing they will do is scruitinize men's. You've heard things like "Women are more forgiving of bodily flaws than men are because they are less visual?"....I think that a lot of that is just projection. Women want to be forgiven for their flaws, so they will be more forgiving of flaws. In fact, I think that the "current" penis-size emphasis is probably just retaliation. Women want men to know what it feels like to be glorified, or unglorified for a body part--particuarly one that you have no control over. Internet porn has also "englightened" women as well; unlike past generations where women were practically living in the "dark." In essence, women want men to feel the insecurities that they have always felt, and the internet and more verbal expression are their tools of revenge. Don't forget that not too long ago, it was desired that women remain virgins until marriage...hence their knowledge would be "limited" to only that of her husband.
Anyhow...I think that Spears and Simpson have "lowered" themselves by making those penis comments. Again, do you think that it would matter to any woman even if it were true? I'm not a celebrity buff, but if neither of those men retorted with some nasty comeback about their wive's bodies--it shows class. I doubt that either of those women are "perfect" and the men could have revealed something personal about them. But the bottom line...is as I said....who would take those comments seriously anyhow (considering the source)? Under the circumstances would you? In fact, if anything, I'd think the opposite were true--that they were large.
But in any event, despite what men believe, from my own experience (and I grew up in the free love era and have over the years discussed sex with many, many women), and penis size (even in the general sense), was not really a part of the conversations; and certainly never in the personal sense.
"However, when a former ex's name gets brought up in a negative or positive way, it directly speaks about the ex, no two ways about it, and it can imply things about the current SO."
And that applies to anything really....face, breasts, earning power, attitude, etc....and it would also apply to scruitinizing a stranger or a co-worker (it still can "imply" things about your current SO). But for some reason, penis size has created the largest "stir" amongst the public. Women have dealt with their breasts being scruitinized since the beginning of time (they are one of the first things to be scruitinized by most men because their size is "visible")....but no one thought that scruitinizing even passerbys in a way "implies" things about how that man feels about breast-size (and therefore can be a comparison to his current or past SO's)....but now that the "shoe is on the other foot..." it's now an issue of "tact." It's the "male ego" thingy again.... ;-)
Edited 10/15/2006 10:00 am ET by rain_dancer_iam
Simpson was not being anything but her usual self. She didn't seem to be making fun of her ex, but was in the process of talking about their marrage and how she had loved him no matter what their differences.
Now as for Spears, well, she was making fun of Timberlake, but seeing as to how Spears has a lot of 'jerk' in her, it was likely that she was telling the truth and didn't care. She's a very frank person. If you had watched her crappy reality tv show you would know this. Spears also said her current husband, Federline is 10 times better in bed than Timberlake (I don't think her and Federline were married yet when she said it). In fact, Federline's also got a rave review about his bed skills from his ex wife, when she was interviewed about his hooking up with Spears. Since the time he got together with Spears many photos have been taken, of course, and I recall one of him wearing jump pants that showed a bigger than average flaccid (soft) penis bulging through. The reason I'm bringing that up about his bulge is in order to connect the dots and show another reason why I think Spears was likely being truthful-she makes fun of a small penis and her current SO has (if his flaccid is an indication, it's certainly not "wormlike") a fairly big penis, and she has talked about how great sex is with Federline over Timberlake. So it would appear penis size does matter to her. Yes, one can say I'm making assumptions here, but they are reasonable ones, even if they were to turn out to be wrong ones. In other words, I'm probably right.
Timberlake recently came out with a new CD called Sex Sounds. He's dating a well known actress, though I can't think of her name at this moment. He shows no indication that he has let Spear's words stop his love life, or singing about sex when he wants to. Maybe he's lucky enough to be one of the secure guys when it comes to his penis size, even if it's small. Maybe. He's talented in the music industry, and her husband Federline isn't. Federline has been trying to develop his rapping/singing career, but it's been gong nowhere because the talent just isn't there. Because of his marrage to Spears he's gotten his foot in the door, but that's it.
Isn't Timberlake dating Cameron Diaz? I could be wrong...but again....goes to show you...even if it "were" true....it's a non-issue for most women.
It's most likely that Timberlake said or did something to Spears while they were dating or at the "end" of their relationship and she just wanted to get back at him or maybe beat him to whatever it is that he may have threatened to reveal about her. You never know what goes on behind closed doors...no matter who it is. But just to show you...even though the two are "equal" (discussing Federline and Timberlake's parts and performance)....I'm sure that Federline doesn't "mind." ;-)
....and just to put another spin on this whole discussion, I saw some of Anderson and Tommy Lee's "supposedly" leaked out "private" sex videos. The stink that everyone made about Lee's size is still ongoing. To tell you the truth....in all of the footage that I viewed, nowhere did Lee ever perform oral or manual on Anderson. In fact nothing but oral, manual (for him) and intercourse occurred. My "impression" of Lee was that he was a terrible lover--big penis and all. ;-) His his ego was clearly the most prominent feature in the videos! tee hee I do not get women who like men who are so arrogant and narcissistic, that they have to do a song and dance to "keep" them. Guys like that would never last with women with good self-esteem. In that case, I would have walked out the door....with my last words referencing his penis (obviously because he thinks he is God's gift because of it!) with a simple: "What a waste!" ;-)
Edited 10/15/2006 2:04 pm ET by rain_dancer_iam
Oh, after I said that about Pam Anderson and had already posted it I recalled a quote of her's and I hunted it down. Of course I realise you may stay the course and say she either didn't mean it or didn't say it. :) At any rate, here it is:
* PAMELA ANDERSON: December 2003 Loaded: Does size matter? “I’m not going to pretend it doesn’t make a difference. I know some women say that size doesn’t matter. But it does, at least for me. Put it this way: I can’t see any down side to a man being well hung.” “So many women fight over how big their diamonds are, but the size of the stone is really about their man’s ego over his little thing. I think diamonds have a direct relationship to your man’s penis size. Does size count? Unfortunately, yes.” (quoted in mid-1990s Cosmopolitan article) In British tabloid News of the World (quoted by Jwats): “Size definitely matters. Whoever says size doesn’t matter is a liar with a small dick. But I’m lucky, I never met any of those.” About her recent boyfriend Kid Rock, she indicated he measured up to her high standards: “Oh, he’s got absolutely nothing to worry about,” she said with a grin.
Do you really think that they have any relation of substance? Do you think that it is anything but a physical union? There is no doubt that where "superficial" unions are concerned, the standards would be all physical...and high, at that. ;-)
I doubt it, though, had Kid Rock or Tommy Lee not been packing, she'd had dumped either one. My guess...she's not in it for the sex (as unbelievable as that may be); she's in it for self-esteem. Only the thing is, that it does the exact opposite--depletes self-esteem.
These are relationships of little substance that we are speaking about; it's not fair to compare it to a true relationship based on more than just the superficial.
It's likely that Anderson is playing the "revenge" card as well; it's obvious that she has problems. Who knows what she encountered in her life.
Of course, from a physical stand-point, some women may simply enjoy a large penis for the feeling it produces, the visual appeal and for other reasons as well....but the point is, that I do not know too many women who would merely say "next" to an otherwise great man, just because his penis is small; so size really doesn't matter to most women. I look at it this way....there are no guarantees in life. It would be no different than being with a man who lost the ability to get an erection. I do not think that too many women would dump a great man because of it.
So....you think whatever Anderson asserts about size is gospel and applies to most women? My guess is she doesn't even like sex (you know what they say about those who try and overcompensate). The videos, if anything, are proof--she was performing....not having mutually gratifying sex with the man she loves....well....duh.... ;-)
Edited 10/15/2006 5:45 pm ET by rain_dancer_iam
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