LDR sex

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2004
LDR sex
2
Thu, 11-25-2004 - 1:37pm

Me and my guy are in a long distance relationship, and we only see each other every 4 weeks (in other words, sex is only every 4 weeks for about 2 or 3 days). What my problem is, is that when we first get together at the beginning of each visit, after our first time having sex then, I get really swollen down there and it's painful to have intercourse. Each time after that, it gets a little more painful each time (but I don't stop cause both of us would hate it if we couldn't do it during our few days together). A few days after he leaves, it gets better, so I don't think its a medical thing. What can I do to relieve the swelling and pain?

And we do use KY (when we remember it, when we forget we just use "natural lubrication")

~Jen~

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
In reply to: stormdancer19
Fri, 11-26-2004 - 12:54am

I'm thinking of a couple of different causes. Firstly, there could be the simple cause of you guys simply wearing it out ;-) This could especially be the case if you are at it for lengthy period the first time. I've never been able to have intercourse for more than about 15-20 minutes without becoming inflamed (and bored LOL). Thankfully, DH doesn't usually last that long. Phew.

My other thoughts are indeed medical. Perhaps you have an allergy to either the lube or condoms? Just a thought. Try changing brands and see if that helps.

Either way, I would advise you to see a doctor *while you are inflamed* to see if he can figure out if it's allergy or wear 'n tear. He may also prescribe topical steriods.

good luck, Aisha

Dress Up Games, Doll Makers and Cartoon Dolls @ The Doll Palace
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
In reply to: stormdancer19
Fri, 11-26-2004 - 11:30am

Hi Jen. You're on a sex board and are anonymous, so forgive the personal questions. ;)

I'm right in line with aisha on this, and YES, please double-check with your doc and all is okay. Your time with your guy is limited, so see that doc and make sure that you can keep that time as perfect as possible, right?! Right.

Sorry to nag, but STOP, stop when you are feeling pain. Your time together is limited, yes, but you must stop when your system isn't running smoothly and safely. Taking the risk of causing more damage is never worth it. Just my opinion. If you really want to please each other, then please consider your options that aren't so "rough" on you down there while you're still "recovering" sorta speak.

Fun times including oral sex or maunal sex or even sensuous body rubs that lead to them are very fulfilling for many couples as well, and have been terrific replacements for those times that excluded intercourse for various reasons. Again, these are simply fun ideas that prevent your sensitive area down there from being treated too roughly from the treatment/friction of intercourse and gives you time to recover and possibly prevent anything harmful.

Just curious, while he is away, do you stimulate yourself with a vibrator or a toy of that nature? If so, do you notice any negative reaction at all to the use of it or the unnatural lube or anything? I'm wondering if this is simply a case of you reacting to something specific or if this is just a common case of being too rough too soon after you first begin with him during your times together. Just an idea to keep in mind.

Really hope the board here is helping ya. I used to be in an LDR for periods of times, so the Mrs. & I know what its like. God Bless.

:)
:)

C h a r a c t e r


above all else


Mr. Para

 

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