me and my friend

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2004
me and my friend
4
Wed, 11-17-2004 - 4:17pm
ok i am quite confused though i am not a virgin this is my story plz help me out.
Ok well i found out that alot of my guy friends like me and i like 1 of them but im scared that when we hook up that when he touches me im going to be imbarased.I look good i got thighs and a big azz and some what of a flat stomache but i have streach marks ... and i am scared that if he sees me with out my close on that he will leave me because im not perfect and it makes me not want him to touch me what should i do ?and im bigger than he is so i wont sit on his lap or any thing...uhhh dont know how you can help me but my friend said this worked so can you help me out?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Wed, 11-17-2004 - 4:37pm

Do you know that you are going to hook up sexually with this guy you like?


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2004
Wed, 11-17-2004 - 5:24pm
I am not sure If we are going to hook up i have not seen him in a week on purpose i am scared that he will ask me and i also have another question how long should i wait till i should become sexualy involved with him....
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Wed, 11-17-2004 - 5:56pm

How long to wait? Wait until you are comfortable with him. I would think that would be at least a few weeks of dating, if not months. It's difficult to say because it depends on you. I can say that you should only do what you feel comfortable with. You might find that you are really comfortable after a few days - or it might take months. Any guy that really likes you in the way that you want to be liked will wait and let you take your time. Sure, guys can be horney and want to have sex or have sexual contact. Nothing wrong with them asking or suggesting it. The decision is entirely yours though. You should never feel pressured to give in and feel that you HAVE to do something sexual.

Even if you see him this weekend and he wants to hook up or have sex you can just tell him - "I don't know you well enough yet! I like you but I'd like to get to know you a bit better before we do something like that!"

Go on some dates, kiss him if you want, even let him hug you and touch you if you like, but don't go any further than you feel good with and don't let him pressure you into doing anything that you feel uncomfortable with. Easy to do. Move his hand away if he goes in for a feel. Tell him "No, not yet, that's going to far at the moment".

Of course he may be a really nice guy and wait for YOU to make the moves on him! :-)

Going back to your OP, you are worried about what you look like and your body shape. Look around you at your friends. Even though they all have clothes on you can tell what shape their body is under those clothes, can't you? He knows what you look like, and he's still interested in you. He's into you because you ARE you. Your body is just part of the package that he likes - your personality, how you talk, how you think, how you dress, what you do, are all part of the package and he likes all of it. None of us have perfect bodies and most of us are always unhappy with some part of our bodies that everyone else thinks is actually pretty good. Try not to worry about it so much.

Don't forget that this guy will be worried about all sorts of things himself - does my breath smell fresh, is my penis big enough to satisfy a woman, does my hair look cool, is my stomach flat enough, my arms could be a bit more muscley. We all worry about stuff.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Wed, 11-17-2004 - 6:08pm

I agree with everything Westie said in his post.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd