Need Some Advise

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Need Some Advise
15
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 4:50am
I have a serious question that requires a mature answer. I'll start of with a little background info. I am 20 year old male and a virgin. I am attracted to Scene girls (Suicide Girls if you are familiar). I have fantasized about having strap-on sex with a girl. Does that make me gay?


Edited 11/14/2008 11:33 pm ET by subscene-method

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 7:01am

Welcome to the board, Subscene.

There are a lot of women who have fantasies about being with other women. Some would say it's gay, others may not. I think it depends on what you think you are. Are you also interested in being with men? Is it possible that you're bisexual? Are the fantasies something you would like to see become a reality, or just something you want to keep as a fantasy?

Are you attracted to women outside of the SG type? If not, it could be that you're just finding a fascination with them.





iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-1999
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 10:49am

I have seen a couple of studies to suggest that all women are bisexual to a certain extant. The first study had people look at pictures of others on-line and found that even straight women will look at good-looking girls just as long as they will look at good-looking guys. The second study hooked up a machine to look at people's physiological reactions when they looked at pictures of naked people. While straight men had a reaction of getting turned on only by the naked women, the women in the study all showed reactions to both genders.

That is not to say there isn't a difference in degree. Some women will get turned on and fall in love a lot more with other men. Others will get turned on and fall in love much more easily with other women. Some will be somewhere in the middle.

You are the only one who knows how you have felt about either gender both emotionally and physically. It sounds as though you are attracted to women. If you're attracted to men as well, then it's up to you if you want to try dating both genders or just want to go after one or the other. There is nothing wrong with either choice. It's normal at your age to still be confused about your sexuality and where you stand. As you get more experience in relationships, you will have a better sense of what works or doesn't work for you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 3:11pm
Well, actually I know for a fact that I am not attracted to men in any way(I have tested this). Yet, I am not sure whether or not I want the fantasy to become a reality or not. I am attracted to more than just SG girls, but they are what I prefer. I have had several relationships with women, just none that really worked out. This particular fantasy just made me wonder, and it confused me a little.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2006
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 3:22pm
Wanting to have a woman do you with a strap-on doesn't in any way make you gay. I have a fantasy about DW doing me that way, one that we plan on making a reality in the near future, but it's HER that I want doing me that way, not some guy. Enjoying anal stimulation and being sexually attracted to men are two totally different things.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 4:11pm

Okay, now I see that you're a guy, not a female. Thanks for filing out some of your profile.

Why would you think it makes you gay to want to have sex with a woman?

Do you have fantasies about having regular sex as well as strap on sex?





iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 4:48pm
Okay, I thought you were female also.
Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2008
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 7:43pm
The studies are wrong - they obviously cannot be generalized to the entire population.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2008
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 7:46pm

If you have no attraction to men then it sounds like you are gay - no biggie.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 8:19pm

The OP is a male.


Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Fri, 11-14-2008 - 2:36am

Yes, I do have fantasies about regular sex as well. It was just confused due to the fact that I'm young, I'm a guy, and the way American culture is when pertaining to anal penetration when it comes to males.

Thank you all for your help with my issue!

Pages