In Need of Some Tips
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In Need of Some Tips
| Fri, 07-29-2005 - 8:08pm |
I just found a new guy, and we've had sex about 4 times. But each time he hasn't come (he came once but that was not from intercourse). He says it's because of the condom, I guess not enough sensation. So I was thinking about maybe prolonging sex during our booty sessions, getting him more turned on before actual intercourse that way he's more anxious or whatever, maybe he'll come easier that way. Any tips on how to do this?

You can't control whether or not he reaches climax. If he says it's the condom, then thatt's probably what it is. It could also just be nervousness. But whatever it is, it's something that he has to deal with. You can't fix it.....
If it's truly the condom....and for many guys it is, you could wait hours, and it still won't change anything. Unfortunately, unless you've both been tested and have agreed to be monogamous......you need to use a condom, and he needs to learn to deal with it. Many guys say they don't like condoms.....but that's what safe sex is all about.
He's not going to die if he doesn't reach his climax from intercourse.....you can always finish him with your hand...or he can do it himself. He keeps coming back for more, so you can be pretty sure he's not unhappy! Also, just not making a big deal out of it will help him get over it. Give it some time.....it could just be "new partner" nervousness.
He says that it's the condom but that will only be part of the problem. They DO reduce the sensation a bit but once he's used to it and used to the two of you being together he will be able to orgasm easily enough with a condom. Basically it's just a little bit of lost sensation combined with the nerves of having to "perform" with a new sexual partner. Give him a bit of time and he'll loosen up.
Anyway, you are using condoms for a good reason. He hasn't really got the option to go condom-less at this stage.
I think the idea of extending the foreplay is a good one. That'll help him to relax as much as it gets him more aroused too.