New bf's a virgin....
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| Tue, 04-05-2005 - 9:42am |
Update to the new (younger) guy I'm dating. We've only been dating a couple weeks, he's 23, I'm 27. So far, absolutely wonderful.
Then I got a huge shocker last night - he confessed he was a virgin, which no one knows but his 2 best friends. And I would have never guessed, because so far he doesn't seem at all inexperienced. That, and he's a total jock/gym rat, plays every sport imagineable, and he's totally hot!
But he told me he had had a gf for 4 yrs, but they never had sex. He said it's not because he didn't want to, that it was her decision. And since, he just never found someone that he wanted to have r'ship with, and he would never do a one-nighter. I admit, I found that so respectable, especially for a guy his age.
What I worry about now, is that I'm not a virgin, (which he knows) and have slept with a fair amount of guys - 7 (which he doesn't know). I have also never been a guy's first. I guess I'm just a little nervous/overwhelmed now, because I have the feeling I will probably be his first very soon. So just looking for any advice or to hear similar stories anyone would like to share.

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Don't allow this news to make you feel pressured or nervous.
My DH was a virgin at 22 when we met and I was also pleasantly surprised by the news because he seemed very comfortable and experienced. And he had girls throwing themselves at him so one tends to make assumptions one shouldn't. I only wish I had known it before we became intimate but he confessed weeks afterwards.
And don't feel the need to tell your guy how many partners you've had since that number will only stick in his mind and do nothing but harm, particularly in this case. Your past is your past so leave it there.
Just let the first time progress naturally and let him take the lead as much as he chooses. As Tish pointed out, he may or may not know how to please you, so don't hesitate to ask for what you need.
This is a gift he's giving you so just enjoy one another.
Edited 4/5/2005 10:39 am ET ET by katmandoo2001
Advice from my corner would be to hush up the worries and just enjoy, LOL! No better way to put it.
You're with him because of the fantastic relationship, so just let your physical relationship with him be nothing more than of the non-physical relationship you enjoy now.
DON'T view this as do or die perfection or anything. Just enjoy each other and enjoy each other. There is nothing to be nervous about.
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