Newsweek - Why get married?
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Newsweek - Why get married?
| Wed, 07-14-2004 - 1:24pm |
There are some interesting responses to the Newsweek article on cheating wives which brings up a question? Why do people still want to get married, on the affair support board many are wanting to marry their affair partner and start the perfect life. If you are a male the court system is going to destroy you in a divorce so why keep getting married. Just a note to start, I think there have allways been just about the same amount on cheating women as men (who would the men have sex with, so it has to be about the same). A recent college study with a lie detector showed that women lie about sex questions and that throws off surveys that don't use them. Over all the percent of cheating women and men has increased over the past thirty years as well as the divorce rate. Currently, according to paternity lab results, about 30% of children in divorce cases were not fathered by the husband.
Getting married is a huge gamble with your life and the current success rate is less than 50%. I am currently married and have been for a long time but if I were ever divorced or a young person starting out I don't think I would ever marry. The odds of being betrayed are just too great.

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I could see your point, but like Kat said, I like to believe there are still people out there that value commitment and marriage.
I think when people get married they usually intend to be monogomous and married for life. Also the often quoted 50% divorce statistic may be misleading. It says that 50% of marriages end in divorce. For instance if there are 8 couples who got married and stayed married and 2 couples that got married and divorced 4 times that would still be 50% of marriages ending in divorce.
I believe that marriage provides the perfect basis for raising children.
*ezizabef*
*ezizabef*
I totally agree with that statement. Children *deserve* to have both their parents involved fully in their lives, and no matter how well you get along with an ex the parent living away from the kids will not have the impact they would living under the same roof. That is *exactly* why we won't risk a threesome. Our children will pay for any fall out if it causes irreprable damage to our marriage.
>>As for many young women these days....call me cynical, but I do believe that for many, the driving force is the fairytale wedding day - not the long term implications of what they are doing.<<
You can say that again LOL. My wedding didn't go the way I wanted it too, too many cooks in the kitchen I guess, but I didn't care. I just wanted to get married. I have seen some girlfriends who really got out of hand wanting the "perfect day". I think also, people apply alot of cliche's to marriage and try to follow them. Like, don't go to bed angry. Huh? We do. Usually by morning we don't even remember what we were fighting about and just get on with the day. If we are still not in agreement by morning, we have atleast had the night to cool off and speak to each other rationally. I guess what I am getting at is people are trying too hard to follow what they "should" be doing in a marriage instead of just doing what works for them even if it isn't how the book says it should be done.
Leticia
>>I think also, people apply alot of cliche's to marriage and try to follow them. <<
What about the cliche of "love will conquer all".
"Everyone wants happiness, no one wants pain, but you can't make a rainbow without the rain."
Marriage takes work, I know that. My mom and dad got divorced when I was in 5th grade. Even though the divorce "stats" are "50%" that just depends on which studies you look at. As for cheating, I think that's the most rude thing you could ever do. Why would you get married and then want someone else? Even if it gets boring it takes two people for a relationship to work.
As for my wedding, I can take all the time to plan and think what I want, but my future husband's opinion will matter in OUR special day. Just my 2cents.
Exactly
Leticia
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