No experience at all. HELP!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-20-2004
No experience at all. HELP!!!
10
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 11:38pm
OK so I just started seeing this really amazin guy, Josh. Hes the first guy I've ever been with sexually and he knows that. He said he teach me as we went but once ur in the moment it gets pushed aside. I love foolin around with him but I have no idea how to do anything. He says Im doin fine but? I've gottin pretty good at oral but I'm still not comfortable with hand jobs. Can someone please give me a little insite on how to make them really good for him. Any would be greatly greatly appeciated.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2004
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 11:59pm

He told you he'd be happy to teach you.....so if "in the moment" he forgets to let you know if it's what he wants, then you need to ask him. Even if anyone here tells you what they like....they're not him. Every guy is unique, and every guy likes different things done to and for him. No matter how much "experience" you have, every new partner is a new experience, and you have to ask each of them what they like, and how they like it.

All you have to do is ask......is this right? Should I go faster? Harder? Softer? He will be GLAD to tell you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 12:03am

Learning as you go is all part of the fun.

Handjobs? Not much to them really. You grasp his penis and you pump your hand up and down. Most guys seem to enjoy having lots of lubrication to avoid the skin chaffing so either use lots and lots of saliva or get some lube. Something like KY liquid is good but it does tend to dry out fast. A few guys like a handjob with no lubrication.

You'll probably want to grasp fairly firmly. Most guys grasp firmly when they masturbate. You could cup his testicles with the free hand and play gently with them. You could try gently rubbing the tip of his penis with the flat of your palm as you pump with the other hand (it may be too sensitive for that). Twist your wrist in a corkscrewing motion as you pump up and down. Try holding both hands together like you're praying and slide his penis up and down between your palms. Make a fist and slide his penis through it until your fist reaches the base of his penis, and let go, as you start sliding the other hand down in the same way. Repeat. It feels like his penis is continually sliding down a long tube.

Some of those things he may like, other he may not like very much. It's always a good idea to ask him to masturbate for you so that you can see how he does it. You'll be able to get an idea of how much pressure to use, where and how to touch him.

By the way, a good BJ uses a lot of these moves too. Stroking and playing with his penis as you use your mouth at the same time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-20-2004
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 12:18am
Thanks to both..... He has masturbated infront of me the first night, we ran outta time and realized it just wasnt gonna happen, so we finished ourselves off as the other watched. He did hold his base, I dont remember him using lube on himself. When I was doin it to him I felt like I was hurting him cause my saliva got rubbed in to much and got dry quick. I cant imagine buyin lube. How would he react when I just pop it out. He's 25 has alot more experience. Im 19, and still get embarrassed walking in the condom aisle at WalMart.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 7:39am

You have to find out from him what he likes, ask him as you're doing it if this is how he likes it.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

Avatar for ariesgirl26
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 5:14pm

well the best advice i can give you is to ask him what he likes, I have asked my husband ages ago how he liked it, and showed me and then moved my hand on his area, and showed me that way too!

Good Luck!

Jessica

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 5:30pm

>>I cant imagine buyin lube. <<

Trust me, if no-one bought the stuff, why would they have it for sale? Plenty of people buy it. Wait 'til you need to buy a few groceries if it makes you feel better and you can throw it in with the shampoo and the tampons! Makes you feel a bit better.

I think that he would be pleasantly surprised and at worse he'll be intrigued if he's never used a lube of any kind. Lube is a good thing and having your g/f buy it is, well, kinda cool because it shows that she's got some ideas up here sleeve and not afraid to express herself sexually.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-20-2004
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 7:46pm
See I work in a grocery store and all the "old" people buy it. He not my "boyfriend" were just dating. Still too early in the relationship to call him that. Anyone have a reccomendation on a good brand.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 8:32pm

>>See I work in a grocery store and all the "old" people buy it.<<

Sometimes old people know more than young people. I'd say the main reason is that they don't feel so embarrassed about buying it. They know that other people buy it and that it'sn nothing to be embarrassed about. By the time young people figure out the same thing, they're old people too.

I've been buying lube since I was in my late teens.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 9:55pm

I must one of those *old* people you've checked out in the store (46 yrs old) but I've been buying lube since I'm 19 yrs old.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 11:31pm
I must be one of those "oldies" too, Tish! However, my DH and I have been using lube from the beginning when he was 22 and I was 20! I can't imagine just gritting my teeth while he dryly rubbed away, during foreplay! Ouch!