No time for SEX with DH due to baby : (

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2004
No time for SEX with DH due to baby : (
5
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 9:55am

Hi! Since the birth of our DS (now 5 month old) we hardly have time to be together intimately. My DH and I have a very busy schedule:

I work from 8:00 a.m. till 2:00 p.m. then I pick up the baby, eat lunch, exercise for an hour, visit my family, then go to sleep 8:30 p.m. and wake up several times to nurse.

My DH works from 8:00 a.m. to 11:30 p.m. and comes home 12:30 in the morning and falls into bed!!

I asked him to wake me when he comes into bed so we can have time together but he feels bad to do that and the truthe is I am not too happy about being waken.

I really do miss my DH and the times we spent together but how do you all manage when your baby needs so much of your time???? (the other baby gets forgotten I guess ;)...)

Thank you for your help.

Sara

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2005
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 10:50am

I remember at about 5 months, the last thing I wanted was another person touching me.

-Savanah.Jane

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2005
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 10:52am
we have a busy 2 year old running around and it's hard to find time where the baby's occupied long enough for us to get time alone toghether....I'm almost desparate enough to hire a baby sitter or send the baby to granny for a few hours so we can do it LOL...
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 11:03am

Honey, this too, shall pass! Listen, all parents have to deal with this and all the other problems that go along with only having 24 hours in a day AND a new baby.

Be patient and forgiving of one another but is there any reason why you can't jump in the shower together while the baby is sleeping? Put the baby monitor in the bathroom and get "clean" together.

One prerequisite for new parents....you have to learn to be creative and FAST when you have an infant in the house. But it's those quickies and all the efforts to stay physically in touch that will make all the difference later on.

Good luck and hang in there!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2003
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 2:56pm
Hi! I know what you are talking about! We have a 9 & 5 year old and 4 month old twins! I stay home and DH works till 6:00 P.M., So our day is not as full as yours but with the twins EVERYTHING has taken a back seat! I would try to schedule a time for just the 2 of you. That's what we do, My parents live right down the street, the older 2 spend the night with them so we get a little time to ourselves. But there are some nights when we only get a couple of hours of sleep!(If you know what I mean:o!) I know it is really hard when you don't have the time or the engery, but it is well worth it!
Maggie
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2003
Thu, 06-16-2005 - 7:00pm

"I had one on the boob, one on the leg and a DH asking for his turn" OMG, lmao!!! You hit the nail on the head with that one! I love that description.

To the OP, welcome to the wonderful world of parenting. You learn after awhile to live through the dry spells and make the most of 10 minutes alone in the bathroom. I lost count of how many quickies we had in the downstairs bath standing up, just before DH would go to work and I would put dinner on the table.

I know the different shifts are hard to work around - been dealing with them for 15 years. If the baby is fed, quiet and content and in a safe place such as a playpen or crib, there's nothing wrong with taking a few minutes to be alone in the next room. Get a monitor if you don't have one (although I could never get in the mood with baby noises in the room). Believe me, if he cries, you'll hear him. Or try waking up a few minutes earlier on your days off together. Sometimes just starting the day like that can make missing a half hour of sleep worth it. Find a sitter or family friend and go out for an evening. Or find a friend willing to trade off or take your baby for an hour and just stay home with DH. You have to be creative and your sex life will diminish for awhile, but it can be done.