normal?
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normal?
| Sun, 12-31-2006 - 11:02pm |
My boyfriend and I have great intense sex. We connect perfectly and it is amazing however once we have sex he is out of comission for at least an hour and when we try to have it again he seems really into it but can't seem to keep it up for that long (5-7 minutes). He gets upset and says he's sorry it's not me it's him. I don't mind at all but part of me still thinks he is just not turned on enough and it is in fact my fault. Is that it? Should I try and do something to make him more turned on? Or do some guys just need more time to "recharge"? Thanks for all your help in advance!

First of all, it's NOT YOU and it's not ABOUT you! Guys aren't machines, and no matter how much YOU want it, for most guys, it's not going to happen again, particularly without an hour or two of rest & recouperation. Sure, there are guys who can go again in 10 minutes, but that's NOT the norm. In your case, he's lucky he even gets an erection....most guys can't right away. As for how long he lasts, some guys never last any longer than that the FIRST time around.
If your sex is great and intense, enjoy it. If you're not getting enough the first time around, then maybe he can try to make the first time last longer....but that's up to him, and again, has nothing to do with you. Maybe you should just lay off the requests for seconds, if it's causing him to get upset.....and THAT is because he's feeling inadequate about pleasing you. He shouldn't get upset, because it's perfectly normal to need time to "recharge".
Perfectly normal.
Most guys need time to "recharge". It varies from guy to guy. For one it might be a few minutes, for another it might be a whole day. A good half hour is probably what the average sort-of guy needs before he can get it up again. Some will need a bit of extra help from you to get it up too. Others will spring up like normal without any help. Some guys will be able to get hard and go for ages before cumming a second time. Some guys will get hard and stay hard but not be able to cum againe. Others will struggle to keep it up the whole time.
To put it in a nutshell, most guys need some time to get another erection and if they do get it up the results vary widely from guy to guy.
It's not about you either. Nothing you are going to do will help much. If he thinks that he is almost ready, you might be able to help get him up and hard again with your hands or mouth, but if his body isn't ready nothing you or he can do will help.