Not even a minute man
Find a Conversation
Not even a minute man
| Thu, 01-11-2007 - 3:24am |
This is a very awkward subject for me to discuss hence the fact I am doing it anonymously online. I have been in a relationship for a few years now and am actually engaged to be married the problem is we are sexually incompatible. I honestly don’t know how to even bring up this subject with him as I am fearful of damaging his ego. I have tried to prolong it by stopping or squeezing the head prior but it really doesn’t help at all. Our sex is literally over the minute he puts it in. In the beginning I just thought it was because he was nervous and we were new together but it has been over two years without improvement. I do not enjoy having sex with him because it is so awful. I know it sounds silly but I often cry because I am so unsatisfied. I guess I'm just looking for possible solutions. Am I going to have to just learn to live with this or can it be fixed? I honestly believe if this does not improve I will have to end everything because I fear if I stay I am going to cheat.

Pages
Stop worrying about his ego and hurting him hon, if he comes the minute he puts it in then he knows he isnt getting the job done. You must tell him and search for a solution or you must break off the engagement. Period. End of story. If you two are this sexually mismatched how can you possibly have any happiness in a long term relationship? Anyone who says sex doesnt matter in a loving relationship is lying...sex is a wonderful way to physicaly express your love and passion for someone.....sounds like you two may have a BIG problem. But if you love eachother enough you can fix it.
Bad communication skills often leads to bad sex. If you don't tell your partner what you want, or what the problem is, how can you expect him to know? chances are, he is thinking the same thing, but too embarrassed to say something to you.
Why not suggest seeing a sex therapist for the both of you, to learn more about your bodies and sexual desires? You don't have to mention the problem though it is a good idea. The problem isn't that big of a problem really, it can be sorted out. but not if you bury your head in the sand and pretend it isnt happening, when all the while, you are so frustrated you are crying, and eventually you'll get resentful towards him.
Often men come because they are excited too much so that can be something you can work on. Get him to train his mind and focus on lasting, chances are, he comes without even thinking. but if he actually thinks about lasting, he may actually last.
penisrings, which tighten around the base of the penis, are meant to be brilliant at controlling your mans pleasure. You can tighten it, loosen it or do whatever you want with it, which can aid him in lasting. www.annsummers.com has a selection of vibrating, non-vibrating penis rings. They also now sell blue pills, made to help your man last as well.
Good luck x
Pages