Not Every Guy Can Do This????

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2006
Not Every Guy Can Do This????
23
Mon, 07-17-2006 - 12:17am

I was having a conversation with a few of my friends when one of them mentioned that she wished her husband would last longer sometimes. When I asked her why he doesn't just keep going until she is done, they all looked at me like I had lost my mind. She said, "Um Honey, once a man is done, that's it. He goes limp and it takes quite a while for him to get hard again."


Now, I realize that I have not had many partners. DH and I got married when we were both 20, so we learned what we know about sex from each other, books, and by hearing about things from other people and trying them out. Until today, I was unaware that not every man can

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2006
Tue, 07-18-2006 - 11:25am

Yes, I'm sure he is ejaculating the first time. I can feel it. I guess he could be just having a half orgasm. Can they do that and still ejaculate? Because if that's only half of what he could be putting out, I don't think I want to see

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 07-18-2006 - 11:28pm
i have been with my SO 6 1/2 years (he was 19 i was 17) and he has always been able to ejaculate and then keep going, actually more then once, it has been as many as 4 or 5 times! he can ejaculate, leave it inside me and it will get hard again in less then 2 mins. and lol he is not faking nor halfway ejaculating trust me. after round 2 or 3 it may take a few minutes (less then 10) to be ready again. but i do understand that not everyone can do this, i have been with a couple guys who were done after one no matter what, however SO is not the only one who could go again right away i have had others too so i wouldnt say that either one is rare?!
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2005
Wed, 07-19-2006 - 9:32am

The good doctor's "guidance" notwithstanding, I learned some time ago that my ability to maintain an erection after ejaculating is dependent on a number of variables, e.g., stress, jet lag--I travel internationally a lot. DW says that she thinks it's irrelevant as, unless she is in a mood for something different, I help her achieve orgasm(s) prior to our even beginning intercourse. So much for the good doctor's "informed opinion" that:
"The primary reason that total control is such a mystery lies in the fact that most males are very self-serving creatures and the desire to go beyond his normal abilities is not all that desirable."

It's clear from the good doctor's post that he is as pompous as he is shallow in his understanding of the range of creativity and giving that sex provides us.

David.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-24-2005
Wed, 07-19-2006 - 9:27pm

I've read the responses to your post and feel that nearly all of them hold at least some grain of truth.

For instance, your husband is rare in that the great majority of men--regardless of age or the condition of their health--do not experience continuous multiple orgasms as women do.

Most men following orgasm and ejaculation (resolution), generally experience both detumesence (disgorgement of blood from the genitals) as well as a refractory period lasting several minutes to several hours in which he cannot be stimulated to orgasm. This allows the body to return to its natural resting state.

There are however, exceptions to this rule, though the cause is not always clear. There may be subtle differences in male physiology that make this achievable for some men but not for others. Additionally, certain drugs ingested prior to sex can aid in maintaining an erection after orgasm.

There are also certain ancient Tantric mind-body control principles (including 'circular' breathing--a technique that must be studied and mastered) which can allow a male orgasm to last considerably longer than is typically seen. This doesn't necessarily translate to multiple ejaculations. But it can make a man's erection last several hours.

I own an adult film in which a man is clearly coming repeatedly (perhaps 4-6 times in a 5-10 minute period) with little if any apparent decline in his erection, and where trick photography was not involved.

To date, to my knowledge there simply isn't enough data to draw a clear conclusion about male multiple orgasm. Once more scientific research is gathered, then hopefully we'll gain more insight into this phenomenon. At present however, it remains a gray area in the scientific study of human sexuality, much like female orgasm prior to the late 20th century.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Thu, 07-20-2006 - 2:01am

Well, you seem to attract them, don't you

...."Any of numerous European and North American birds having pointed wings and a long tail. The chick which hatches from the egg laid in another species' nest methodically evicts all other occupants."

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2005
Thu, 07-20-2006 - 10:29am
Ok, this miserable heat must be frying my brain! I don't have a clue what you're talking about! Are you calling me a bird of a different species? (If so, you wouldn't be the first to think I'm a wierd bird, lol)
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2005
Thu, 07-20-2006 - 2:13pm
I guess every man is different. My hubby has times where he still stays hard even after he finishes and can even cum a second time, but those times are very rare. 99% of the time, he does go limp after he finishes and it's all over with for a little while. We rarely, RARELY ever go at it again, but the times when we have he has had trouble getting and staying hard.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2005
Thu, 07-20-2006 - 10:00pm

A friend of my mine calls her husband a 3-minute man and she's lucky when he can last that long - he's 41 and she swears he'll climax at just the sight of V.

I know that some men can climax without ejaculating. And in my first-hand accounts, climaxing allows him to maintain the erection while after ejaculation he'll usually go soft. Of course he may slow down after climaxing and then pickup tempo. At 53, my guy does this a lot and he can last 30-45 minutes (then sometimes I can DO him in 5!).

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Fri, 07-21-2006 - 12:58am
LOL! I suppose it was a little obscure. You attract them - cuckoos, that is. The doc was a little cuckoo, I thought.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2005
Fri, 07-21-2006 - 2:09am
Ok, it's cooled off now.......and I get it. Yep, you're right, not only here, either!
And yes, I agree with your assessment completely.