numerous partners
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numerous partners
| Thu, 07-01-2004 - 12:12pm |
Ladies or Gentlemen, would it , or does it bother you if your mate confessed to you they had been with ,say 15 others before you? Does it bother you to know that that many people have enjoyed what you now consider sacred? Is it a positive or a negative effect on a relationship? Or should it /does it even matter? Pleases dont turn this into "they should have kept it a secret or lied about it" issue. Assume you were friends before lovers, and you were told in confidence as a friend.

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a:) I'm no virgin myself & if I've been around I cant expect any different from my partner
b:) The past is the past, unless disease is involved
c:) unless shared & understood I could comment, the persons history is their business, if they share that part of their life with you, that's a very sacred trust
d:) Finally, they are with you now, so does anything else matter?
IMHO
Stephen
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martinisnsushi - living the good life since 1963
CL Redbook "Get Inside His Head"
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martinisnsushi - the two most important food groups!
To us, the important thing is that we are together. We both have told one another that we are the best match either of us has had.
Only a very insecure person would worry about it. Wondering if someone else was better than them.....did they have better bodies, etc. That's a complete waste of time, because maybe someone WAS better, I can learn. Maybe someone DID have a better body. Who cares? He's with me now, and if the ones in the past were that great, he'd still be with THEM!
A secure person wouldn't even ask in the first place. In the situation that you describe, it was told to a friend, not a partner...and you can't undo THAT either.
I make it a policy not to ask, nor will I tell- it has nothing to do with the current situation!
what DOES matter is sexual health. my current SO and I simply had the 'how safe have your sexual experiences been' convo. we asked what we'd been tested for, and how we wanted to prevent pregnancy etc etc...but how many women he'd been with? i don't care! how many men i'd been with? he doesn't at all care!
i think so long as you know you're safe, you're fine!
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