O?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2002
O?
2
Thu, 12-13-2007 - 12:37am

Ok... I am 18 and I have been with my bf for about 6 months. Before him I had had sex with 2 other people... one of them was just once when I was super drunk and the other was probably about 5 times when I was 16, so I had little to no experience before my current bf. Now

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2006
In reply to: morganlovesaj
Thu, 12-13-2007 - 6:50am
Hi morganlovesaj, and welcome to the board. Every woman is different as far as how easy or difficult it is for her to reach orgasm, and many women find that they can't orgasm from intercourse alone, which isn't terribly surprising considering that most of your nerve endings in that area are in your clit. DW and I pretty regularly use a vibe on her clit when we have intercourse in order to help her get off.

It is very possible to become desensitized by a vibrator, and to start needing the vibration in order to get there, so if that's a concern and you still want to be able to orgasm using your fingers, maybe try mixing it up and don't use the vibe every time you masturbate.







iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
In reply to: morganlovesaj
Thu, 12-13-2007 - 8:31am

Welcome to the board, Morgan.

I agree with the advice Steve has given you so far, but I wanted to add that making an orgasm a goal can work against you. You need to relax and enjoy the sensations, and you will be more likely to have an orgasm. Also, while it is possible to become dependent on a vibe to get off, many women never experience an orgasm during penetration alone.

Since you were able to use your fingers in the past, have you tried to use them during intercourse to stimulate your clitoris? (Or has your BF used his?) Just try to mix up different things (the vibe, your fingers, oral, etc.), and enjoy the pleasure that each of them brings. Also, feel free to fantasize even while having sex. Fantasizing will help to keep your arousal high and your mind busy (in a good way)!

Here are a few articles that you might also find helpful:

"Why are my orgasms more intense during masturbation?"
http://magazines.ivillage.com/cosmopolitan/experts/carnal/qas/0,,638353_634298,00.html

Bad Vibrations: Am I dependent on a vibrator?
http://love.ivillage.com/lnssex/sextaboos/0,,83v0,00.html

Why can’t I have an Orgasm?
http://love.ivillage.com/lnssex/sexorgasm/0,,drruth_qr4q,00.html

Everything You Want to Know about Orgasms
http://love.ivillage.com/lnssex/sexorgasm/0,,traceycox_c4qgbvt5,00.html

Of course, you can keep posting questions here, but you might also want to visit the website, www.the-clitoris.com. There's tons of information there about your anatomy and how it responds to stimulation.

Keep us posted on your progress, and feel free to join in the discussions any time you would like.