OMG.. he went down on me..
Find a Conversation
| Wed, 07-04-2007 - 9:49pm |
i ALWAYS told myself no matter what i wont give oral..no matter how much i love him.
& just because i wont do it to him.. (i thought of it in a sense to think "well..when i get married i`ll do it." but i dont know. anyways..i wont let him give oral to me..
until the other day..my bf of 2 years went down on me & i couldnt tell him to stop. it felt so good, i didnt think it was nasty or dirty.
i felt very selfish because even though i told him i wouldnt do it to him, he gave it to me anyways..so i felt that he must really love me. after he did oral on me for the first time...after he was done i put my lips on his penis and just sucked on it about 5 times/up & down. i stopped because i didnt want anything to get in my mouth that would gross me out anymore.
the next day we had sex..he went down on me again..but this time i didnt give it to him.
i felt bad..and he seem kind of irritated but didnt say anything to me about it..he still hugged, kissed & carressed me no matter what. but i really love him & i know he wants me to do it but im just not comfortable..im still shocked that i did it for the 10 seconds i did do it...lol
i just feel ashamed & dirty if i do it...like hell treat me differant. i dont know why.
it wasnt as bad as i thought it would be..it didnt taste or smell bad..its just in my mind that its nasty, gross...etc
next time we have sex i want to do it..but with a condom this time.. wish me luck,
i have a feeling i will back out of it though. but i love him so much..
and he doesnt have a problem with doing it to me..he even makes jokes like...
"i want some cake...but i already tasted it. its sweet."
what do i do? or say to him...

Pages
Edited 7/5/2007 6:40 am ET by bostonsteve
What you should say is "That was wonderful.....now it's your turn!"
What you should do is to realize that oral sex is a part of being intimate. There is nothing "dirty or disgusting" about your genitals or his. If you do it with the thought that you're giving HIM pleasure.....then it should be a pleasure for you to do it. Lovemaking is as much about "giving" as it is about "receiving"! If you truly "love" someone, you would "give" whether or not you "receive"!
He wont treat you any different for that. Oh well yeah... he will treat you like his queen! LOL
There is nothing wrong with giving him oral. The first time I was grossed out. Just try this: Both of you take a shower so you are sure that everything is nice and clean. Honestly, I tried with a condom and the lub in it makes it taste bitter. Is just not good. My trick is to just take a shower and just forget about anything that Ive been told in the past about oral sex being bad. It is not bad. Now I see it as the most normal and beatuful thing in a couple's intimacy. Just try to enjoy the fact that you are make him feel great and that is with the man you love. He loves you. He wont think bad about you because there is nothing wrong with it.
hey good on yer! when i first got with my bloke i said i would never give oral or recieve it! but like you, after a few years i tried it and so did he(he was more up 4 it than i was), 5 yrs on i still dont feel completley comfortable recieving it, and like you , i do not like him finishing off in my mouth, (yuk) its really not a major thing in our relationship, i prefer not to recieve oral but dont mind giving it now and then. theres so many other things that u can do as u no!! at first i felt dirty like a prostitute or something when giving oral but it soon gets better. my man doesnt push me , hes fine.
you will find as time goes by you will feel more confident and comfortable. by the way if your thinking of giving oral with a condom on, i dont recommend anything but mint flavour!!
good luck and enjoy
xxxx
Connect With Me
Making a Second Marriage Work
my partner in the siggy exchange
There are lots of people who aren't sure how they feel about oral sex, and there are lots of inexperienced people who say what they will and won't do in the bedroom. While those decisions are individual, I will say that I've never known a man to treat a lady badly for performing oral sex on him.
Having a sexual relationship is about bonding, intimacy and pleasure. Closing your mind off to things that can enhance that relationship will prove to cause you more damage than anything else, IMO. While it's your body, and you have to do what is comfortable for you, just understand that your opinion of what is comfortable will change over time. I'm also of the opinion that we all continue to develop sexually, if we allow ourselves to.
It's great that you had a pleasurable experience with oral sex. Don't try to script what you'll do next. Just try to enjoy what you are doing once you get there and see where that takes you.
Connect With Me
Making a Second Marriage Work
my partner in the siggy exchange
thank you all.. i feel so much better...lol
i was feeling embaressed,but i realized that im definetly not the only one who feels like this.
thanks again.
stormi
:-)
Like the others have said, he'll probably feel the same way about it as you did! "Goodness, she really does love me if she wants to do it to me!".
I don't think that it would hurt to tell him that you want to try to do it but know that it's going to take some time to get used to it. You don't want him getting excited and rushing you. It feels great and sometimes a guy can get a bit excited and he might try to push you a bit further and faster than you are willing to go.
My wife has told me that when she was new to sex that oral was something that she was never going to do. She thought that it was gross too. Nowadays she's fine with it and loves the sensations and knowing what she can do to me by doing it. She wonders why she was ever so grossed out.
he hasnt ever pushed me to do it..
but i know he wants me to..what guy doesnt.
im going to tell him about how i feel though.
thanks again
I know its hard to get over an idea that you have lived with (or had pushed on you) your whole life. My XH was one of those. He thought it was dirty and nasty (only doing it, not receiving it) and he felt that way about other acts of love during sex too. I never could change his mind which contibuted heavily to our divorce.
But listen to the other posters here. Its an act of love and if you are both clean there is nothing wrong with it. Semen is good for you if you do happen to swallow it and most times it doesn't taste bad, just salty.
You might try flavored condoms. They do have them and it might make it easier for you. Plus you may just try licking up and down his penis with your tongue and lips for a while till you get used to it. I hope you learn to see that it isn't bad if you are doing it for someone you love.
Good luck to you!
Pages