Once you go big ... can you go back?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2005
Once you go big ... can you go back?
60
Tue, 10-18-2005 - 2:28pm

This question involves intercourse. For the most part, I've never been in a situation where I could have intercourse with a man who was very large (say well more than 8 inches). But I've heard stories from a few girlfriends and other posts here, that speak of an experience where they've never slept with a very big guy. However, then they do, and if they can take them in, sex with smaller men is never the same.

So my question is, once a woman is able to take a very large guy in, is there no way she can get that intense feeling from intercourse with a smaller man?

Are the women who have an intense experience with bigger men, who subsequently can't get the same experience again with smaller men, girls with large vaginas?

Are Kegels the key to sucess in taking in a smaller man?

***Please, no soap boxing or attacks, or size doesn't matter speeches if you don't have experiences that answer the questions. ****

I specifically want to hear from women that have gone from small/average, to BIG (enjoyed), then went back to small/average and enjoyed that too (intercourse wise).

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 10-20-2005 - 9:18am

I have to wonder if the LOOK of a bigger penis isn't more of a turnon for some women than others, too, and so naturally, you would already be guarenteed a better experience for that factor alone.

I don't find a larger than average erection visually arousing at all. In fact, it looks almost menacing to me. Maybe the perception has more to do with the favorable response of some women than the actual physical aspect of a larger erection. Just a thought.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2002
Thu, 10-20-2005 - 4:15pm
I was with my ex for four years, and he was a pretty average guy. Then I started seeing someone else briefly. The first time I saw his 8" penis, with fairly sizeable girth, I thought to myself, "where does he think he's putting that?" And yes, it took some getting used to, but I was still more aroused by what he could do with his penis than the size of it. Visually I didn't find it appealing at all. It's not that I hadn't been with a big man in the past, but during that past experience the lights were out both times, so I couldn't see what I was dealing with.

 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2004
Thu, 10-20-2005 - 5:19pm

DW has had partners that ranged from much larger to much smaller than me (I'm pretty average myself), and enjoys toys of varying sizes, from thinner than I am to enormous (10", fat as a beer can). She reports (and leaves evidence) of being very satisfied with both large and small phalli. From my perspective, I can report that her vagina is very elastic, and while it may be a but looser immediately after having used a very large toy(which is an enjoyable sensation in itself), that she's tight as can be the next morning.


--


martinisnsushi - the two most important food groups!

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 10-20-2005 - 6:26pm
Key words in your response...."what he could DO with it." This guy in question was obviously skilled as a lover, at least from your perspective, and he would likely have been just as skilled with an average-sized erection.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2003
Thu, 10-20-2005 - 8:42pm

"Kegels will tighten the PC muscle which surrounds the opening of the vagina, and has no effect on the vaginal muscles."

There ARE no "vaginal muscles" . The PC muscles are the ones that matter ( they are the ones that contract during orgasm). The PC muscles do not "surround the opening". They are a large band of muscles that extend all across the pelvic floor. Men have them , too.
Practicing Kegels can definitely help. For men, too.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2003
Thu, 10-20-2005 - 8:59pm

OP, you said,
"I specifically want to hear from women that have gone from small/average, to BIG (enjoyed), then went back to small/average and enjoyed that too (intercourse wise)."

DW won't post on this board, so I'll have to give it to you second-hand. DW has had more than 20 partners in her life. One was "huge" , it was VERY uncomfortable, and even the guy was very aware of the problems and had had women refuse to have IC with him.

Two more were "large", the rest were average, though there was one "very small" that she could hardly feel at all. One of the "large" men was her (2nd) husband of 10 years. She said his size was somewhat uncomfortable and they had to use certain positions because of it. She never orgasmed from intercourse with him and it became just a chore that she did to make him happy ( fortunately it only took him about five minutes to finish).

Now, I'm average, but fairly girthy. In the beginning, she enjoyed IC, but didn't orgasm from it ( she never had with anyone else). After a few months, she began to orgasm from IC and over time her orgasms this way have gotten easier and more satisfying until now she much prefers IC to any other kind of sex.

Our emotional closeness is certainly the biggest factor in this, but on a physical plane I think the way we have IC and especially the fact that I always last at least 15 minutes are also factors.

"Are Kegels the key to sucess in taking in a smaller man?"

Absolutely ! DW practices them and has very well-toned PC muscles and this makes a big difference. I've heard this confirmed by other women in discussions on this board and others.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Thu, 10-20-2005 - 9:08pm

>>it gives me enormous confidence as i find that whenever a woman sees my manhood she always wants to sleep with me<<

I would have thought that by the time she sees your penis she has already made the decision whether or not she is going to have intercourse with you. If she is pleased with what she sees it is a bonus - not a deciding factor.

I don't think that you can say that your penis size was responsible. And if a woman was sleeping with you purely because she had prior knowledge of your penis size, then you are not going to know unless she actually says "I'm only having sex with you because of your penis size".

>>i have had quite a few partners that have orgasmed through penetrative sex that haven't with other people <<
So have I and my penis is fairly average in size. Again, penis size might have been a factor in your situation but I don't think that you can say it's the only factor. Certainly wasn't in my case.

My partner has had larger and while she enjoyed it, she also found that it was going to hit bottom and hurt more often too. She tells me that she prefers "smaller" because it feels just as good, and there is no need to be on edge waiting for it to hurt. That's good enough for me and no-one else has ever complained. :-)

I'm sure that big penises can feel good to many women and that many would not want to "go back". But likewise, I doubt that it is the deciding factor for many women and many can happily go back to a "smaller" penis.

I think that it's probably the same for guys - a tighter vagina isn't the be-all and end-all of things.

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 10-20-2005 - 9:29pm
Agree with your comments, Westie. There are just too many other deciding factors for what makes a great lover than just the size of one's genitalia.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2002
Fri, 10-21-2005 - 8:06am
Ah yes, but when I first saw his penis I didn't know what he could DO with it.

 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-20-2004
Fri, 10-21-2005 - 10:09am
Kat and Tish. "Its not the size, Its what he does with it" Talking from experience, there are only a few different things a man can actually do with his penis, once it is incerted. He can vary the position, angle, depth, speed and rhythm. In some positions he may be able to let his pubic bone come ito play to help with clitoral stimulation, but that isnt really his penis now is it. We all know about manually stimulating a clit also. ( but again that isnt the penis).. Maybe I`m missing something here, but I dont think so...To me getting a woman ready for intercourse is the most important factor (foreplay) If, by the time penetration occurs, she is really really ready, and "hot and bothered" she should enjoy the experience much more. Some women like the rhythm to be slow and sensual, some hard and fast, and different variations the those themes.
Im not trying to be smug here, I AM curious about this statement. Obviously not every woman Ive been with has orgasmed thru penetration ( any man who thinks they have with him isnt understanding that some women do fake it.)No man is THAT good..lol
Trying different methods based on the feed back one gets from their partner is key, IMHO.
Being a good lover isnt aboutdoing the same thing to every woman because womens likes and dislikes are different. Being a thoughtful lover, understanding foreplay, good and varied oral sex techniques etc. is what I perceive being a good lover is all about. Thats why I think having a long term partner leads to the best sex vs. a lot of one night stands.