orgasm

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2006
orgasm
4
Sat, 10-21-2006 - 12:49pm
my guy has never gave me an orgasm. nor it seems like he wants to. he doesnt really like foreplay much, and like to get straight to the action. and once he's done, we're both done...even though i'm not! what can i do to get my guy into it more and so i can finally hvae an orgasm! plese help!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
In reply to: saramarie86
Sun, 10-22-2006 - 4:07pm

There's a couple of things here. First of all your b/f can't really "give" you an orgasm. It's not like he hands you a gift wrapped present, it's something that you have to make for yourself with his help. You have to know how and what gets you there in the first place and then you have to guide and show and encourage him to do what you need to get there. In a nutshell, your orgasm is ultimately your responsibility.

The first step is to make time with the foreplay and since he doesn't seem to like it, you are going to have to do a couple of things about that - first, it sounds like you need to talk to him. Start by telling him that you love the sex but would love to spin it out a bit longer and take more time with it. Explain that you really like foreplay and that lots of foreplay is the best way for you have an orgasm. Even the dumbest b/f should get the hint.

If he doesn't, tell him that you'd like to take some more time with whatever you need to have an orgasm. Use lots of positive reinforcement - say things like "When you down on me, you are the greatest and it feels so good. You know if you stayed a bit longer I'm sure that you'd make me cum", or "I love it when you do...", "You've got a great technique/tongue/fingers." etc.

Secondly, there are two of you having sex and he can't get to the intercourse if you won't let him. At the end of the day you CAN be more assertive and instead of letting him jump on top and get straight to the intercourse you can suggest or show or actually even say that you'd like more foreplay.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2004
In reply to: saramarie86
Fri, 11-10-2006 - 9:10am
Well, you can always help yourself out by masturbating during sex...also you can insist that he continue with foreplay...that may be uncomfortable to do, but not having an orgasm is also uncomfortable. If he doesn't like it, tell him to take a hike.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2005
In reply to: saramarie86
Sat, 11-11-2006 - 5:30am
Get a Trojan Vibrating Ring. Slip it on his penis and turn it on just before he enters you. You both will love it. I love for my DW to rub her clit during intercourse.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2006
In reply to: saramarie86
Wed, 11-22-2006 - 2:56pm
Have you ever had an orgasm on your own? If you haven't, try masturbating by yourself - that way you can figure out what gets you there without feeling self conscious or pressured or anything. Then, once you know what gets you off, you can show him. And, from one girl to another, if he isn't interested in you being as sexually satisfied as he is, he's totally selfish and you should dump him. Seriously. You can find someone better! :)