Pantyhose

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-05-2005
Pantyhose
31
Mon, 09-05-2005 - 1:45pm
My boyfriend is great but..he only seems really turned on when I wear pantyhose. I have tons he bought me. But he wants them on me day and night, at work, at play and in bed mostly! I wear them under jeans, and he loves the "80's Flashdance" leotard look. He even rips them so we can make love while I wear them. It turns me on to feel sos exy but is he just an incurable fetishist?
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2002
In reply to: tammimoore99
Wed, 09-07-2005 - 12:41am

I know for me personally, just putting on sexy lingerie and KNOWING I look good helps me feel confident and sexy (not that I'm not normally haha). Sometimes that extra boost of confidence is enough to make me want to take complete control of the situation. Because I know if I don't, that lingerie won't stay on very long!

Even if just wearing it without the intention of sex, it is an instant mood improver. We all know a happy woman is more attractive than a scowling woman hehe.

Janet

 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 08-21-2005
In reply to: tammimoore99
Wed, 09-07-2005 - 1:35am

As stated by another poster, the word fetish is used often a little to loosely. But it seems to apply in this case. By definition, from Webster's, a sexual fetish is one in which the particular fetish MUST be present for the person to have arousal/erection. And the obsession can often handicap the person, and certainly partner, from complete sexual expression.

Its one thing to find something particularly erotic and have a preference for it, but a fetish becomes the ONLY way of sexual expression, talk about boring...

On a lighter note, I am fortunate to be the opposite of a fetish person, absolutely EVERYTHING turns me on. But for many years my favorite lingerie was dark blue satin teddy.
But had never actually had a girlfriend who had or wanted one. So, many years down the road, my best friend and wife were in town visiting family, and spent the night in my 4 bedroom bachelor pad, I had lots of extra room for them and their kids.
After the kids went to bed, we got comfortable and Julie( best friends wife) came into the living room to watch Survivor with B. and I. Dressed in a dark blue satin Teddy.
I of course couldnt take my eyes off of her for the first min or two, then tore my eyes away. But I couldnt help myself and kept looking back... When I felt the swelling and my mouth begin to water( the mouth watering happens rarely, only for the 10's in my life),
I had to say something. So I excused my self and appologized if I embarrassed them, explained my liking for dark blue teddys, and told them if they were comfortable with me staring at her, drooling, and fantasizing about her, then she was welcome to stay as is, but if not Id really appreciate it if shed chage, because I was very uncomfortable with being so aroused by my best friend's wife.
I was of course hoping shed stay, but she went and changed into flannel.

Its nice to have particular things that are more erotic or attractive, but to have one obbession is a terrible handicap, and I hope the original poster can live with it( its at least one you can live with, as you can wear panty hose in a lot of different situation) or find out if he can and wants to talk to a professional, because he really will be handicaping the both of you and missing out on the incredible variety of sexuality.

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: tammimoore99
Wed, 09-07-2005 - 2:07am
Same with my DH, Rain. For some reason, he thinks I'm sexiest when I'm NOT trying! Go figure.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2004
In reply to: tammimoore99
Wed, 09-07-2005 - 9:32am
He looks sexy, just not sexier. ;-)
Imagination is more important than knowledge." (Albert Einstein )
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2004
In reply to: tammimoore99
Wed, 09-07-2005 - 10:13am

The dictionary at dictionary.com describes it more as an abnormal obsession or attachment...and something which "may" become necessary, not something that "must" be necessary.

Fetish...

"Something, such as an object or a nonsexual part of the body, that arouses sexual desire and may become necessary for sexual gratification.
An abnormally obsessive preoccupation or attachment."

Maybe that's why the term gets used loosely. Wouldn't you describe the OP's boyfriend as having a fetish even if he didn't require it to become aroused? He has an obsession and attachment issues with respect to stockings, whether or not they must be present for arousal.

Imagination is more important than knowledge." (Albert Einstein )
Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: tammimoore99
Wed, 09-07-2005 - 2:44pm
I agree with this too. It's not the clothes that make the man or woman sexy or sexier. My DH wears suits every day so when he's all scruffy and unshaven on the weekend, that's a different look for him...and for me. But he's sexi-EST when he's naked.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
In reply to: tammimoore99
Wed, 09-07-2005 - 5:49pm

>>It's not the clothes that make the man or woman sexy or sexier. <<

Oh well, there goes my theory that a well dressed man in a good suit is "sexier" than when he's in dirty trackpants. I'm sure that my partner will love that when we next go out for a romantic evening and I wear some old dirty jeans or something I've found on the bedroom floor ;-)

I know that I can't speak for other men, and Yes, there are times when a woman can look dead sexy in nothing but a flannel nightshirt, but I would have thought that most men found your average woman to be consistently sexier when she was wearing nice clothes, nice underwear, and had her hair and makeup done.

Frankly, I just find it difficult to believe that women don't think the same of a well dressed man. Yeah, men can look great in ripped jeans and a 5 'o' clock shadow, but I thought that well-dressed would score points every time too.

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: tammimoore99
Thu, 09-08-2005 - 12:48am
Noooooot necessarily! Sometimes, depending on what your usual daily attire is, the opposite can be true. My DH looks great in a suit but that's what I see him in MOST of the time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
In reply to: tammimoore99
Thu, 09-08-2005 - 7:28pm

>>Sometimes, depending on what your usual daily attire is, the opposite can be true. <<

Good point. I came to that conclusion myself while I was thinking about it. Some guys look best in jeans and a T-shirt, others look best in a suit. So if you revise my original suit theory to account for that, there must be some look, style or combination of clothing that makes your man look sexier than normal to you?

I'm still trying to explain the whole attraction of lingerie. I'm sure that there must be items of clothing that make a man look sexier than normal. And since men don't have a direct equivalent to lingerie, it makes me wonder what items of clothing or look that does it for a guy? Maybe I'm thinking too hard? I think that I can smell smoke.......

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
In reply to: tammimoore99
Thu, 09-08-2005 - 9:14pm

Ok, I can relate to this topic pretty well as I have a foot fetish. By that I mean I become sexually aroused at the site of my wife's bare feet. Removing her shoes and socks has the same effect as baring her chest. She finds this quite amusing and has learned to use it against me. I am perfectly able to become aroused and enjoy sex if her feet are covered and I do not need to touch or see her feet during sex to function. However, if I'm sucking on her toes during intercourse, the climax will be at least twice as intense. I do not instantly become aroused when I see other women walking around barefoot, though occasionally it does happen. I've read about cases where guys are turned on by shoes or specific articles of clothing without the woman involved, that ain't me.

I've noticed a few things over the years that leads me to wonder if feet are becoming a sex symbol(or maybe I'm seeing what I want to see, I really don't know). Ever notice that celebrities pose barefoot on magazine covers and indide the magazines as well? Not just in swimsuits but I've seen it with formal wear too. Ever notice a lot of women in TV commercials are barefoot? Is there really anything wrong with being turned on by feet, hair, or hands in addition to or more than the usual erogenous zones?




Edited 9/9/2005 12:38 am ET ET by jmedic20