Parents finding out u started having sex

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Parents finding out u started having sex
36
Tue, 11-02-2004 - 1:51pm
I've got a question and I'd honestly like to hear what parents think because this is about parents.

Both my mom and my bf's parents don't know we're having sex. My mom knows I'm on bc but she thinks it's because my doctor recommended it so that my cycle becomes regular and all of that. The only time we really get to go at it is Fridays when nobody is home at his house. We were talking about them finding out one day and we both were like "OMGOSH".

Anyways, he had a dream that his parents found the condoms from his room and sprawled them out on the table and when he got home from work they confronted him.

When I think about that idea of them confronting him or even worse, us, it freaks me out. His parents are so amazing to me and I feel like I've corrupted their son lmao. I'm exaggerating. I just feel kind of weird on how to approach the situation if it ever came up that either of our parents found out.

Mind you, my mom is very "Sex is for marriage; anybody who has sex out of marriage is a SL*T" and his parents are very tight-lipped about the whole thing. The only thing his mother has ever said to him was "I know things happen. Just be careful." Those are our experiences with dealing with sex from our parents...

Anybody have experiences, when your parents or your SO's parents found out that you were having sex??

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Avatar for ladypleiades
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2003
Fri, 11-05-2004 - 12:53pm
You have stated pretty clearly what your Mom's reaction will be: Girls who have sex out of marriage are sl*ts which makes you one in her eyes. She has intimated she might kick you out of the house if this were true. All the moms here are pretty open and understanding which would be great, but some of us know that other moms are not quite so open. It sounds a little mean for her to be using the sl*t word so freely, maybe she's saying, if you're doing it, I just don't want to know about it.

It also sounds a little like you'd want to argue it out with her -- the unreasonableness of her position. I don't think you'd have much luck given the emotional quotient of sex and daughters. My experience: after I was married, I was having a conversation with my mom about her friend's college-age daughter who was sexually active. My mom started crying and said that in their day, nice girls just didn't do that. There was no way I could tell her about my past. At least you are being responsible and are in a relationship! I was a sl*t! :) jk

Could you move out and support yourself? If that is not a possibility, I would not invite disaster by confronting her with something she has been very clear about.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2003
Fri, 11-05-2004 - 8:37pm
LOL!
Visitor (not verified)
anonymous user
Mon, 11-08-2004 - 9:15am
While in high school my gf and I just had to "do it" so we went to my house, but went into the garage. There was an old car there that no one drove. PERFECT!. As we got it on, I heard my dog inside the house barking..he knew I was "home"..My mother then flashed the inside garage light on and off....Thats when Im sure they discovered me having sex...Busted by my dog "Slippers"...lol
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-2004
Mon, 11-08-2004 - 12:33pm
Well you should express to your parents how much this guy really means to you and that you aren't making a mistake but having sex..are you planning on getting married?!?! If I remember correctly you said you were 18 or 19 something like that, my ? is to you how do you know that this guy won't get you PG and leave you?!? Sure he can be all nice and stuff to your face to get exactly what he wants...so lets say something like this happens your PG...hes gone...now what do you do!??! How will that change your realtionship with your parents?!?! I would just be cautious with this guy, because you have no idea whats in store down the rode and you can't say that will never happen because you DONT know!!!! GOOD LUCK!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-2004
Mon, 11-08-2004 - 12:38pm
HAHAHAH!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Mon, 11-08-2004 - 1:27pm
Busted by the pooch huh?

bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

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