Past boyfriend size
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Past boyfriend size
| Thu, 11-03-2005 - 10:09am |
At the steep cost of another size question, I would like to know if you think its normal/healthy for a woman to discuss, in some detail, the size of her past boyfriends with her current boyfriend. Do you discuss the size of past relationships with your current one? If so, is it because your current SO asked? or do you feel it is a normal topic of discussion?
I would really appreciate answers to these specific questions, not another ridiculous discussion about whether size matters or size vs. how you use it.

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>>It was my way of saying there are people who do focus centrally on it, and thus they need to tell their current partner about their expectations and to do that, they need to imply that they have had bigger.<<
Actually, that makes sense in a way. There are people out there who do have such high hopes of picking up where they left off, sorta speak, that they feel better those past experiences even with current partners--no matter what the sexual issue.
Again, not all people share that past for that reason, but I agree that some actually do.
What IS unfortunate however is when people tend to downplay others' preferences, as if one was somehow or even than someone else's. Yes, THAT is the unfortunate part of it all...darn shame too.
Each individual and each couple has a unique sexuality or sexual identity, and that uniqueness is special in its own way. For anyone to downplay someone else's or some other couple's special uniqueness as if it weren't as good as his or her own...thats just a darn shame...and an indication of some revealing insecurities if you ask me.
I was wondering if THAT was the part you were referring to as "unfortunate" and all, cause I agree with that for sure, hence the clarification. Thanks for clearing it up though. Good weekend to ya. :)
C H A R A C T E R
>>...when I read the endless "size" threads where it seems to me to be mostly the women who focus on it, I just smile quietly.<<
THAT was an interesting statement, LOL, for I recall from the ladies across these sex-related boards how often the focus on it instead. I don't know WHAT to believe anymore, LOL! ;]
Know what the funny thing is though? On male message boards, it seems of the size discussions involve advice on how to enjoy "without pain" for those couples with larger size issues. There's MUCH less talk about smaller size issues compared to these women boards. We're trying to figure that out, lol.
C H A R A C T E R
I know Im not the only one to help my wife orgasm. But ,its easy for her to do so. Should my ego be brused because other men have had success in making her come? No I dont think so..With the others, they were just boyfriends, she`s in love with me, shes my wife...There is a huge difference there...
Having sex with a boyfriend, or even a one night stand , cant compare emotionally with doing that with the love of your life...No comparison at all.
To have sex for sex sake pales in my view.
A couple who is open enough with each other to actually talk about the past, has a high level of communication, and are extremely comfortable because of it ...Im not saying it is a necessity to talk about the past, but if it comes up or if one partner is curious, I dont see what the problem is in discussing it.
There are always going to be people who are better looking, richer, stronger, faster, smarter, and have bigger penises. Knowing and accepting that fact is half the battle of not letting your own self esteem get in the way if you find out her/his past contains someone different than yourself.
If one happens to be smaller than a guy from her past, It must not matter that much to her, she is with you..If she is enjoying sex with you, then you are big enough....Better than being TOO big, My wife has been there and done that, did not like it one bit.
sorry i have to agree with you on the size many of the size threads are started by men part
for as long as i have been here i have seen a fare amount of females make size threads "he is too small" "am i a slut for liking big penis" etc etc heck i even seen some of the most shallow comments come from females when these threads pop out........i can say females making these type of threads far surpasses men. even on the old women.com site (which was owned by ivillage) when that site was around all it had was owmen bashing guy on penis size
You agree or disagree? Either way, that's fine.
I've been here a long time, too and I can say that while some size threads were begun by women, invariably, male respondants jump on board and we end up with a 300 post thread!
The size issue seems to be a major concern for some men and women and it likely always has been.
But as I've said many, many times, there are size queens out there but size isn't a major concern for the majority of women, IMO. There are just too many other factors that affect sexual response and satisfaction.
Edited 11/14/2005 4:13 pm ET by katmandoo2001
Since we're WAY off what the OP was asking about, we might as well roll with it.
Kat, I certainly can't compare with your knowledge of how the "size" threads go here on ivillage or who starts them or whether more men or women post. But I do frequent askmen.com , which is a "male" board with a lot of female posters. Over there the men pretty much post about their insecurities as to size and are usually on the defensive. It's the women who always talk about how great a big one is, etc., etc. I even notice that pattern here, though there are a couple of men who seem to like to brag about their size.
I have a theory:
Usually the women who talk about "the big ones" aren't too specific about whether they orgasm or not - they just say they "enjoy" the "big ones"
Women who do orgasm from penetration rarely cite size as a factor.
It's an oft-quoted statistic that most women don't orgasm from penetration.
SOOOO... My theory is that women who DO orgasm know very well size is not a factor. The "size queens" are NOT orgasming, but they figure , "Gee a bigger one must be better".
Whadayathink?
taoist
Taoist, people like what they like for all kinds of reasons.
So, I happen to think that many women who enjoy bigger than average penises, like them for many reasons, not just for how they feel. They like how they look, they like the fact that there seems to be some bragging rights, they believe, if their man HAS one, etc.
The excitement that a woman may gain from the look of a larger penis alone, may help to enhance her overall experience. Much as a man might be more excited by a woman's enormous breasts. So, it's not really the large erection itself, so much as her own perception and the results of that. Make any sense to you?
And some DO seem to enjoy feeling stretched to the limit.
But we also have to look at the possibility that many women may use these forums to "get back" at men, in general, for the scrutiny and judgement we have always endured in regard to our bodies.
It's a opportunity to put the pressure on men for something they can't change and make them feel a little insecure if they don't measure up to a supposed standard.
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