Physical or is it me???
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Physical or is it me???
| Tue, 06-03-2008 - 11:19pm |
I have been dating this guy for five months now. I kept hoping this problem would go away, but it is still happening regularly. I feel weird asking this question but here it goes.....my guy seems to have a problem keeping himself erect during foreplay and sometimes during sex. He will be completely hard in the beginning and will be fine if we just go at it but when the foreplay starts he slowly goes limp. By the time we are ready to have sex, he can't get it back up for a while and sometimes can't ever get it back the way it was. I have tried doing things for him and sometimes it works but most of the time it doesn't. The sex is great when we get to it...sometimes it just takes a while. It just gets very awkward. In the beginning I thought he was just nervous but it is still happening. He never says anything about it and will continue to please me but I will then feel guilty. Someone please help me with this! I want to do for him what he does for me! Is he just not into me or is there something else going on? And what do I do to help him out? I have also wondered if it is because of his size....he is quite large and I didn't know if this could effect that.....I've never had a situation like this before.....

It is NOT you, and has nothing to do with you.
Welcome to the board, adpiluv2001 -- no need to feel shy asking your question here.
A lot of guys have problems with Erectile Dysfunction (ED), and the causes can range anywhere from stress to serious physical ailments. In all likelihood, the problem has absolutely nothing to do with you, although if he's worried it will happen, it is more likely to happen. The less you react to it, the less pressure it will put on him.
When you say he's large, I'm not sure if you mean he's physically large (as in overweight) or if you mean he is well endowed. Since health issues can cause problems with ED, being overweight can contribute to various conditions which may or may not contribute to the ED.
The best thing that you can do for him is to encourage him to see his doctor about what's going on. A lot of guys don't want to do this, but besides causing problems for you in the bedroom, it could be a sign of a health issue. Here are some articles that you can check out:
iVillage Total Health: Erectile Dysfunction Affects 18 Million US Men
http://yourtotalhealth.ivillage.com/diet-fitness/erectile-dysfunction-affects-18-million-us-men.html
Medicine Net: Causes of Impotence
http://www.medicinenet.com/impotence_ed/page2.htm#cause
Mayo Clinic: Erectile Dysfunction
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/erectile-dysfunction/DS00162/DSECTION=3
Keep us posted on how things are going.
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