Please Please Help Me!!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2007
Please Please Help Me!!!!!!
14
Mon, 04-09-2007 - 8:13am

Hi Everyone, I'm new on the message boards and i have quite an embarressing question.

I have never had an orgasm - EVER. I masturbate using my fingers and i usually end up turned on and breathing hard but never any further. This frustrates me so much. I'd love to feel an orgasm. i have tried lying in different positions but it still doesn't help. Vibrators and such are out of the question - i live with a lot of people!!! I usually get turned on quite easily but i can only go so far. I dont know how to fix it - so if you have any tips they would be greatly recieved.

Thanks so much, Lexie x

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2006
Mon, 04-09-2007 - 9:04am

Orgasms come not only from "stimulation" but from the brain. You have to be able to relax, enjoy and "let it happen". Sorry to say, but it takes some women years to learn how to allow them to happen. For more information, check out www.the-clitoris.com

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Mon, 04-09-2007 - 9:24am

Welcome to the boards twinkle_toes. I'm glad you decided to stop in :-)

I have a difficult time masturbating with my fingers too. For me, I usually can't even get turned on! My brain just can't get into the fantasy aspect, or even enjoy the feelings because it's also processing the feelings in my fingers (or something like that). Anyway, I feel a bit handicapped :-)

I use a hand held shower massage and masturbate when I'm in the shower -- this is my preferred method, even if I have the house to myself. Is there a way that you can put one of those on the shower in your house?

To have an orgasm, you do need to be relaxed, which includes not being worried that someone may hear you or somehow discover what you are doing. Also, thinking about having an orgasm will surely help to keep it away. You need to clear you mind and just enjoy what you are feeling, or fantasize about something that you find sexy. Read the link that Sakura gave you -- it has a lot of great information.

Let us know if you find any improvements.



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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2006
Mon, 04-09-2007 - 11:38am
Hmmm, another hand held shower lover! It also works well for us males, atleast this male!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Mon, 04-09-2007 - 3:39pm
Hi Bronco -- fancy meeting you over here ;-) DH likes the shower massage as well, but I don't think he uses it alone -- just when we are together. Of course, lately, I think I'm teaching him some new things, so that may change!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2006
Mon, 04-09-2007 - 3:48pm
Well after learning who the new CL was, how could I resist! ;) Well it is alot more fun together, but it is alot of fun alone too! ;)
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Mon, 04-09-2007 - 8:43pm
Welcome Twinkle- I also can not O with my fingers. I know you said Vibes are out of the question but the one I have is just a real little vibe...smaller than a roll of quarters, and they come in all kinds of disguises such as pens, lipsticks and so on. I have seem them on different websites. If you post a question where to find them on the Solo Sex board I'm sure they could help you out with a website.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-13-2007
Mon, 04-09-2007 - 8:52pm
Just curious, Misty... I have tons of wonderful experience with the shower massager myself as a woman, but how does it work for a man? I can't wrap my brain around that one...
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-26-2001
Mon, 04-09-2007 - 9:39pm
Yeah, I was wondering about that myself. I tried doing it in the shower once, but the magazine got all wet, and then started falling apart!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Tue, 04-10-2007 - 7:57am

ROFL -- you're just a barrel of laughs today! I keep those porn images filed in my brain, so I don't actually need to take the magazine in the shower with me :D



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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Tue, 04-10-2007 - 8:00am
Hey Bronco, can you come back and post some of your shower secrets for us -- curious minds want to know -- how do males enjoy the shower massage?


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