Position Help w/ My "Big" Guy

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2004
Position Help w/ My "Big" Guy
4
Sat, 06-18-2005 - 5:39pm
Being pretty new to sex, I wanted to see if I could get some advice. The guy I'm dating was my first so I don't have a lot of experience. The sex has been what I'd call pretty darn good so far. He's a big guy, about 6'1 and 290 lbs. But I'm not complaining. That's one of the things I like about him best. I'm a big woman too! His size actually turns me on. Missionary is my favorite position and I've read that the woman shouldn't just lie there and let the man do all the work. She should meet his thrusts and move around. But I'm finding this hard to do. I feel like I'm just lying there. I don't want him to think I'm not enjoying it (believe me I am!) because I'm not moving. I've tried but with all his weight on me I feel like I'm pinned down. Anyone in my situation have any suggestions I could try? He's never complained and I'm not complaining about the sex because for me it's great. I want him to know I'm into it as much as he is. I don't want to say anything to him because I'm afraid of hurting his feelings or making him self-concious. Like I said before, I love that he is a big built man. Thanks!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Sat, 06-18-2005 - 7:51pm

There are many things you can do in the missionary position, grab his butt and pull him into you, wrap your legs around his waist, put your legs over his shoulders, rub his shoulder, arms,


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Sat, 06-18-2005 - 9:22pm

Ummmm, usually in missionary, the guy supports most of his weight with his arms. It's not often that you will bear the brunt of a full 290 pounds lying on top of you.

If he is putting all his weight on you then you certainly can't do anything - except maybe get a referee to slap the canvas and count to 3. :-)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2004
Sat, 06-18-2005 - 11:57pm

Well, if he's got all his weight on you, it's a wonder you can breathe, let alone move! Any size guy isn't supposed to be lying on you, he's supposed to be supporting himself with his arms & hands! Are you HIS first, too? If not, I can't believe no one has ever complained about it.

Hon, you need to learn to speak up......if you CAN speak with 290 pounds on top of you, and TELL him that you're being pinned to the bed, and it would be a lot better for both of you if you were able to move. What's better, his feelings being hurt, or you being suffocated!

Have you tried any other positions besides missionary? How about Woman on Top? That way you can "move" all you want, and BOTH of you can enjoy it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
Sun, 06-19-2005 - 11:39am

The others are right, and YES that includes speaking up as well.

The very things you've told us about how you feel about it all, what your concerns are, what you don't want him to think and so on...mustang, HE needs to know those things too.

Just my own experience, but I'd LOVE to know what my wife's concerns are so that I have a better ability to help her relax and enjoy more, and especially without feeling guilty or uncomfortable for her to enjoy the way she likes as well.

Have you already spoke with him about fearing that he may think you're not into it or that you're uninterested? Have you already mentioned to him that you're studying new ways to make that position more exciting for him even though you're perfectly fine with it now?, and that you didn't want him to think you didn't enjoy it as is? I think a huge sigh of relief could be the result if you did. :)

 

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