Pregnancy and sex...

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2004
Pregnancy and sex...
22
Wed, 04-13-2005 - 9:33pm

1. I am pregnant. My SO and I have been having sex a lot lately. We do not live together, though, and every time or almost every time I go to see him, he is ready for sex or head. Before I was pregnant, we didn't have sex that much. Why is this? What's new? What's the difference?

2. My SO said that after I have given labor, he wants me to get a "love-stitch." What is this exactly? He said that after the baby, my vagina will be like "whoa" and that I will need to have it stiched up, to tighten it, I guess.

3. Do men find pregnant women to be attractive? I am 3 months and I am beginning to feel unsexy... unattractive... FAT. I don't see anything sexy about a belly sticking out. I want to be able to wear sexy clothes, too.

PLEASE ANSWER MY 3 QUESTIONS!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2004
Fri, 04-15-2005 - 4:48pm
Honey, I'm 6 months pregnant and my husband desires me almost every second of the day. He doesn't find me fat and unattractive just because I have "this belly" that "hangs out." Pregnancy is a glorious time and you should enjoy it. Negative comments about how you look while pregnant will demean the beautiful experience that pregnancy is. Just enjoy pregnancy. Also, you don't "give labor." You give birth..You go through labor.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2004
Wed, 04-27-2005 - 12:31am
Now I am totally confused. After saying what you said, I think I am going to recommend that my vagina gets stitched up after giving labor, also known as a "love stitch," right? I am afraid that after the baby, my vagina (hole) will be so big and loose that my SO won't enjoy sex as much b/c it will probably be not as tight. My god!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2004
Wed, 04-27-2005 - 11:11am
Do you have some elastic about the house? Now stretch it out and then let it go..Ooo, it goes back into place...Again, after you GIVE BIRTH, everything takes a little bit of time to go back to normal. You will have just had a baby, for crying out loud. Why are you so concerned about him not wanting to have sex with you? Shouldn't you be more concerned about other things like your health and the baby's health more than something that will occur many months from now? Just do your Kegels and relax, for crying out loud. If your SO doesn't want to have sex with you after you've had the baby, then he's shallow.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Wed, 04-27-2005 - 12:25pm

Hightek, your SO has had many complaints about your body from way back when.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-21-2004
Fri, 04-29-2005 - 8:47am
Please don't ever make a decision on anything I say. I am only telling you our experience, please listen to the ladies on this board. They know much more than me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2003
Fri, 04-29-2005 - 9:38am

Perhaps after delivering a baby she was less alarmed about trying to fit a penis inside her.

I used to have "vaginismus" which is a subconcious contraction of the PC muscles. There are many women who find it hard to totally relax (even when they are enjoying themselves completely) so the vaginal canal seems 'tight'. After passing a baby through there, maybe a penis just doesn't seem so frightening. ;)

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2003
Fri, 04-29-2005 - 9:39am
It is funny that you pay attention to the one male poster who offered an opinion, but none of the female posters who offered you sound medical facts.

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-26-2001
Fri, 04-29-2005 - 2:02pm
I'm guessing that the 'love stitch' he's talking about is the repair of the tearing resulting from the doctor performing an episiotomy during labor. It was my understanding that episiotomies had fallen from favor and were rarely done nowdays, but I don't know for sure.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2005
Fri, 04-29-2005 - 2:07pm

Forget the "love stitch" thing. My sister had that, although not intentionally. (There was a small tear after delivery and the ob/gyn stitched it up.)

Intercourse has been painful for her ever since and so my bro in law doesn't "get it" as often as he used to.

I have urged her to get it "fixed" but she is afraid of surger and doctors now.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Fri, 04-29-2005 - 4:35pm
The *love stitch* is

bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd