Premature Ejaculation

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-27-2003
Premature Ejaculation
5
Fri, 06-25-2004 - 8:28am
I recently started reading these boards to help spice up my sex life. And it's definitely helping. Anyway, my husband has always come early (after 2-3 minutes), and I never really cared b/c I wasn't always having fun anyway. So now that things are spicing up, it does bother me. When we first got married, he could last forever. But in the last two years or so, he hasn't lasted long at all. The good thing though is that he can get hard again, so we can do it again (did it three times last night), but I would rather have one longer session. Any suggestions?
Avatar for imblushing
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 06-25-2004 - 8:50am

Hi Steph,


I think you will find and most people will agree that your dh's issues, although directly affecting you and a concern to you, is his problem.


Sharon

A friend is the person who kn

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 06-25-2004 - 12:38pm
Typically, men learn to last longer as they get older, not the opposite. Maybe your DH realized that you weren't enjoying yourself anyway, so he learned to orgasm quicker to get it over with.

IF you are enjoying sex more and asking for what you need from him, then ask him what you can do to make one longer session more possible. Doesn't mean that it will happen but I think you should make your desires known.

IF he's unable to regain his control, you may have to continue to make do with multiple sessions but I think if he's aware of your feelings, he'll make an effort to accomodate you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Fri, 06-25-2004 - 5:33pm
Try just doing a little something for a small amount of time so he wouldn't get too over-aroused. Like licking his shaft without going near the tip of his penis, then stop and make out, then touch him again. Go slow and try not to touch his "hot spots" that could set him off too early.

When I first met my husband, he would come really quickly - sometimes he couldn't even control himself to get inside me first! I thought of premature ejacuation too, but he kept telling me he was just so excited to finally be with a woman that he really connected with sexually. As time passed, he was able to hold off from climaxing so quickly and now, he's master of that. lol. But what I tried to to in the beginning was just do a little something, away from his real sensitive areas, then stop and move and do something like kiss him or give him little kisses everywhere - something to keep his excitement level down.

It was difficult in the beginning, but after he got over the initial excitement of us being intimate, we got into a groove and he was able to last a lot longer.

Good luck. If I remember anything else, I'll let you know!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Fri, 06-25-2004 - 6:53pm
Also - just another idea. The visual and seeing you naked might be over stimulating him right now as well. Try keeping your top on for a little while while having sex and foreplay. You can take it off as you you both get to the point of climaxing. That's what I did. I would leave my top covering my breasts because he would become overly aroused by seeing my breasts and nipples.

Just a thought!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2004
Fri, 06-25-2004 - 9:42pm
My 2 cents:

You 2 can "retrain" your man's sexual response. In the book ESO*Extended Sexual Orgasm by Alan Brauer & Donna Brauer, exercises are explained to control the ejaculation response. There are breathing exercises and methods to finding the "point-of-no-return."

Your man needs to know when he can't hold back ejaculation any longer (point-of-no-return). Good luck & keep us posted. Mac