Question About Fingering
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Question About Fingering
| Fri, 07-29-2005 - 10:35pm |
Hi,
I have never been "fingered" before (or should I say for an extended period of time), it seems my new guy likes to do this to bring me to orgasm (I have not yet and I think that's because I am nervous and a bit self conscious). My question is (hope this does not sound silly) ...is it acceptable to "thrust" and "grind" while he is doing this, like using his hand as I would his penis?
Thanks!

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Hi freespirit,
I think its ok, b/c I did it myself.....when Dh was my boyfriend and we were in high school, thats what we did.
Anything that feels good to you, and is a natural reaction to what's being done to you is acceptable. Why wouldn't it be?
But I have some news for you and your b/f. Vaginal stimulation isn't likely to give you an orgasm......because most women don't have orgasms from intercourse, either. Women need clitoral stimulation (that's part of what you're doing.....moving, trying to get that!)
Also, just the fact that you know he's trying to give you an orgasm (he can't GIVE you one anyway, he can only help you have it!) makes it a goal for you, and the best way to NOT have an orgasm is to TRY to have on. Just enjoy what he's doing, and direct him to your clitoris for more and better stimulation......if you have an orgasm, fine....but if you don't, so what....it's the pleasure that counts, not whether or not you have an orgasm. If you learn to enjoy the pleasure (and not worry about your reaction to it) the orgasms will come.
If grinding or thrusting feels good to you, then do it.
Hi freespirit_gal:
1-Each person is responsible for their OWN orgasm. Your partner is their to ASSIST.
2-The orgasm should not be the goal of sex; but, PARTNER CLOSENESS AND INTAMACY.
3-The orgasm happens AFTER YOU get comfortable with your sexual partner. IMHO, it takes some time to get comfortable with your body, sex, body noises, vaginal queefing, etc...
4-Your sexual partner should be massaging your clitoris. A younger guy may want to INSERT A FINGER into the vaginal canal. The clitoris has most of the nerve endings; the clitoris is the main sexual organ for FEMALE PLEASURE.
Mac
You most likely find that if he like fingering, you will make him nutty if you start grinding and thrusting.
I've been "fingering" for over thirty years and I've ALWAYS known it meant using your finger to stimulate her clitoris. It amazes me that anyone would just be putting his finger in her vagina - unless of course he's searching for that elusive G-spot.
taoist
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