Question about size
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Question about size
| Thu, 04-05-2007 - 11:56am |
I feel a little embarassed to ask this. I suffer with erectile dysfunction (ED) and penis is extremely small. So small that sometimes I have a hard time to hold it to pee. Is this normal, has anyone seen this ?
Ladies - How would you feel if your DH/BF has penis which is very small normally (not errect) ?
Appreciate any honest answer!
Ladies - How would you feel if your DH/BF has penis which is very small normally (not errect) ?
Appreciate any honest answer!

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Every woman has different feelings about penis size. In the end, your penis is only one "tool" you have to give a woman pleasure, and if you know how to use everything you have to give a woman pleasure, and she cares about you, it probably wouldn't bother her.
More importantly, have you seen an Urologist about it? Sometimes there are things that can be "corrected" to "reveal" more of your penis. As for the ED, that is probably because of your insecurity about your size, or there could be some physical problem that can be taken care of.
Before you give up on yourself, get yourself to a doctor, and discuss the situation, and you may be surprised to find that you have options that you aren't aware of. In this day of modern medicine, there are new discoveries every day, and you shouldn't just "write yourself off" out of embarassment or fear. Make an appointment.
Welcome to the board. Should we call you "tara"?
I'm glad you stopped by, and you don't need to feel embarrassed to ask questions here. I'm not sure how old you are, but I'm sure a doctor has seen your penis before and would comment if he/she felt there was anything wrong. There is a fat pad over your pubic bone, and it can mask the "real" size of your penis. If you push in on the pad, often more of your penis will be revealed. If you carry extra weight, the fat pad may be more padded as well, creating a place for your penis to "hide".
Have you been checked for any medical reasons that you may have ED? ED can be caused by both medical factors and psychological factors. If all medical factors (including use of some medications) are ruled out, then it is considered to be caused psychologically. Performance issues, stress, rejection, or worrying about your size are all things that can contribute to those causes. If you haven't discussed ED with your doctor, that is your first step in getting healthy.
Here are a couple of articles that you might find helpful too:
Erectile Dysfunction Affects 18 Million U.S. Men
http://health.ivillage.com/di/dinews/0,,wbnews_b6skrsst,00.html
and here is what Mayo Clinic has to say about it:
"Nonphysical causes may account for impotence. They may include:
Psychological problems. The most common nonphysical causes are stress, anxiety and fatigue. Impotence is also an occasional side effect of psychological problems such as depression.
Negative feelings. Feelings that you express toward your sexual partner — or that are expressed by your sexual partner — such as resentment, hostility or lack of interest also can be a factor in erectile dysfunction."
Here is what they say about prevention of ED:
"Although most men experience episodes of erectile dysfunction from time to time, you can take these steps to decrease the likelihood of occurrences:
* Limit or avoid the use of alcohol and other similar drugs.
* Stop smoking.
* Exercise regularly.
* Reduce stress.
* Get enough sleep.
* Deal with anxiety or depression.
* See your doctor for regular checkups and medical screening tests."
For more information, here is the link:
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/erectile-dysfunction/DS00162/DSECTION=3
Thak you Sakura and Misty,
Your words gave me alot of encouragement specially to ask questions freely here. Just to give you my background. I am 41 yrs hapily married with two wonderfull kids. I am a kidney patient was on dialysis for 5 1/2 years and just received a tranplant 3 weeks ago. My ED was probably caused by the kidney failure and diabetes. ED was gradual at first where I would loose my erectin fast and my normal (without erection) size was normal. AS time went I could not get an erection hard enough for IC and eventually non at all. Due to this we have not had sex in a while.
Now after the transplant my energy level has gone up and I seem to think abuut alot and feel horny (but still bo erection). I do masterbate and ejaculate with my penis still small. I feel very anxious about having sex and I need to get help.
I am not sure how to start this conversation with the doctor. I do see the doctor twice per week I just need to get the nerve to open the topic.
Hi Ta. I know that it's difficult to get your nerve up to talk with the doctor, but they have heard everything before....and they know how important your sexual health is. It's great that you are feeling more like your old self since the transplant! Depending on what other medications you take, the doctor may be able to prescribe Viagra or a similar drug to you that will help with erections. Since you are not getting an erection, it sounds like a medical (not psychological) problem, or it could be a combination.
Let's us know how things go after you talk to the doctor.
I am seeing the doc tomorrow, I will some how bring up the topic.
How effective is viagra for someone like me without any erection what so ever? Would it get me rock hard? I cant wait to have an erection like that again!
I think Viagra is more commonly prescribed for medical ED. My husband had a long-term virus a few years back, and began having arythmia (sp?). He was given medications that caused some problems with ED, and Viagra works very well in his case -- and lasts very long. I think it depends on what conditions you have and what meds you are already on as to if they can prescribe it.
Good luck tomorrow!
Don't be embarassed to ask your doctor ANYTHING! He's a man, he is more than likely sexually active, and he understands your needs, and all doctors now understand the need for sex which actually can promote health.
Being a transplant patient, Viagra and it's ilk might present a problem, because of it's many side effects: http://www.fda.gov/cder/drug/InfoSheets/patient/sildenafilPIS.htm
Your original post made me think you were a single man, and wondering how a potential partner might react to your size. However, the fact that you're married changes things.
It makes me sad to think that because you have a medical problem, you've given up on sex. If you can masturbate, and get pleasure from that, then you still enjoy the feelings that sex gives you. Sex with a partner is very possible even without an erection. Unless your wife never enjoyed sex, and for her this is a good excuse not to be sexually active anymore, why can't you do things to please her, and she can do the same for you. Sex is more than intercourse.....intercourse is only a part of it. What about oral sex? You don't need an erection to pleasure your wife orally, and if you're able to masturbate, she could give YOU oral sex, too. I'm sorry you have these medical problems......but that doesn't mean you have to give up sex completely. Talk to your wife, and see how she feels about it......she may be missing it as much as you are!
Good Luck!
Thank you very much for your advice. Ofcource I enjoy sex very much but was discouraged because I could not stisfy my wife fully and i could not get the full satisfaction of sex by having intercourse. I love the feeling of my erect penis inside her.
Occasionaly I do give her plessure with alot of foreplay. She loves it when i kiss her and lick her niples and play with her p.... This makes her very wet and she most definetely has an Orgasm. She then masterbates me to finsh. But somehow I was never satisfied with this so I have been shying away from sex. Also, being on dialysis did not help - not much energy and did not have much of sex drive. Only thing I was doing was to masterbate my self about once a week on the average.
But now I REALY want to have sex. I just want to have full erection which is rock hard with my "head" all swelled up and put myself into my wifes tight and wet vagina. I hope my dream will come true soon!
Afer I achieve this then I can work on gaining more skils like lasting longer, cumming more than once, improve on giving oral etc.. I think I am so horny now if I can get an erection I think i will walking around with a hard on all day lol
Hi Tara,
Just a story from my hospital job days - at a local VA...
A young man (30's) was a diabetic and had severe ED. This was long before viagra ('80s). He was married and hadn't had any children with his wife yet. This was when penile implants were being perfected. I was the one who drew his blood for his discharge orders. He sat down in the chair very gingerly and I knew better than to ask what had happened to these guys, because it usually was way TMI!!! But without me asking, he started telling me how excited he was to be going home and I responded appropriately that I was certain he was - that a hospital was no place to spend a great deal of time.
Then he told me about having the penile implant procedure. He was so elated - he wasn't trying to be lewd - he just wanted to talk about it and how happy he was that now he would be able to have children with his wife without in-vitro ("the normal way" was how he put it. I don't know how common these procedures are these days, but it may be an option if prescriptions don't work as well as you'd like. Also if you have to take nitrates ('nitro') for chest pain, angina, or coronary artery dilation you cannot take viagra. Talk to your doctor - ask him every question you can think of. If he doesn't have but the regular 15 minutes for your appointment, schedule another appointment to talk with him and tell the staff you will need a longer time with the doctor for that appointment! You're paying him, you know...get your money's worth out of him!
All the best to you! I truly believe that this is fixable!
Moonlight
PS - I'm not a doctor, so of course, everything I said has to be verified by a physician...bet I'm right, though!
Welcome tara, Please talk to your doctor. Don't be embarrassed. They've heard and seen all kinds of things. There is nothing wrong with discussing sex with them. It's part of life.
I hope all went well at your appointment today. Please let us know how things go.
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