Question for ladies....
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Question for ladies....
| Sun, 06-12-2005 - 7:19pm |
I myself has often been decribed by women as "handsome" and "cute" and once by a little old lady as "gorgeous" (made my day...LOL), however I have never heard "hot." I just would like to have a womans point of view on the definitions of these descriptions. Is one able to grab a womans attention being cute/handsome but not "hot?"
Also, once I heard a girl refer to me as "good husband material"...Being a young man made me wonder is this is a good or bad thing. Was it a compliment or not?
Thank you to all who respond.

Welcome to the board.
"good husband material", if I was a guy, I would consider it a very good compliment if I wanted to get married.
LOL! The kiss of death! "You're so CUTE!"
I've been through that too, and tried to figure out where on the scale of male physical attractiveness I stood when all I managed to get was handsome and cute comments too. What does it take to be a hunk? What can I do to make myself more "hunky" and attract more women?
Well, you've either got it or you haven't and there is very little that a cute and handsome guy can do to turn himself into a "hunk" without looking like a fool in the process. So my advice to you is to accept that you ARE physically attractive but may not be "hunk" material. Be who you are and accept who you are.
Funily enough, with hindsight, I was always more successful with women in the long-term than a couple of my "hunk" friends.
I'm sure that you've heard that "beauty is in the eye of the beholder"! So is "handsome", "Gorgeous", "Cute", "Hot", "good husband material" or any other "judgement" call.
What one woman considers handsome can be very different from what another woman thinks it is. I've seen men that I thought were really good looking, and a friend with me would say "Who? HIM? He's nothing!" Neither of us was right or wrong, it was just in our perception of the guy.
On the surface, it's just "looks".....and looks fade with time in many cases. It would be great to be considered a handsome guy, but once a woman gets to know you, you'd better have something more to offer than your looks! If you can't have a good conversation, if you don't show interest in her thoughts and ideas, if you don't treat her as something special.....your looks won't take you very far.
There's also the way you dress. There is nothing more handsome than an "average looking" guy in a beautifully cut suit, white shirt and tie. The same goes for uniforms. Ever notice how women are attracted to policemen? It's the uniform.....it can make "joe blow" look great. The same for men in the service....
But bottom line, all the women in the world can call you "hot"....meaning you look GOOD.....but they'll lose interest fast if you've got nothing more to offer than your looks.
Also, if all a woman is interested in is your looks...then she's very shallow, and when a better looking guy comes along.......you'll be history.
Just my opinion.....
well be happy at least women do thik your cute and handsome and so on, better not find someone like me though who is shallow and cares about nothing but looks. That's just me, most shallow women like myself have nothing to offer anyhow, we ususally suck at things as well, which why we are called shallow. I cannot hold a conversation for the life of me, nor do I have any opinions, or intelligence, like most women do now a days. When my husband and I go out for dinner alone, we have what is called silence, where you don't talk to each other, I mean we do but there is more silence there then anything. I never know what to say, which is probably why men don't hit on me period. Beware of women like me who only go after looks! you will never be happy, or satisfied, period! Now i am understanding why I see so many pretty women, with butt ugly guys they are more deep then I am. besides I don't honestly see what you are complaining about? Women think you're attractive, well that's good, be happy about that! MEN!
I never really thought of myself in terms of being hot, or other positive immage labels...I am in extremely good shape as I have always worked out to stay fit....Once I divorced, women I knew were pretty aggressive about dating me ..I asked one why? ..she asked me , are you kidding???? We always thought you would be a great catch!..who would have thought.
For me, I could never approach men I think are "hot". Therefore, there is a huge difference between "hot" and "attractive". IMO not much of a difference between attractive, cute, handsome, etc.
Looks have nothing to do why a man is in my life. Despite being very physically attractive to XH and having spent 18 years with him, I never thought him as handsome. My first thought of current man's physical traits: goofy. However, I now proudly say he's adorable (yet at times I still see goofy - LOL) and at times he's down right gorgeous.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that it's the man himself that makes him attrative, not his physical being. Hope that makes sense?
Everyone has a different definition for all of these terms (cute, handsome, hot), as well as different opinions concerning the kinds of people that they feel these terms describe. I also think it has a lot to do with how you feel about someone emotionally. I have known men in the past that most people would probably not call "attractive", but I have found them attractive after getting to know them. My BF was always "cute" to me but, once I spent a lot of time with him, I became attracted to him, both because of his looks and his personality. Now that I know him well and have been intimate with him, I think he is downright hot. On the flip side, I have found myself not being attracted to men who, by most standards, would be considered hot. There was something about their personalities that turned me off and it didn't matter to me how they looked at that point.
As far as being "marriage material", I would definitely see that as a compliment. I think of it as being akin to the saying that guys have about a "girl that you would take home to Mother". Although many women these days are choosing not to marry, I would say that most women still desire to do so. If they feel that you are the kind of man with whom they could be happy and secure for the rest of their lives, how can that be a bad thing?
Just to reiterate what GTB already mentioned: "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder." In other words, everyone has differing ideas about what beauty is. And what HOT is.
A man can have great sex appeal, even when he's not very handsome though since it's more of a chemical response to someone.
"Hot" and "handsome" are probably synonymous for many women, though.
Edited 6/13/2005 11:19 am ET ET by katmandoo2001