Riding
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Riding
| Wed, 07-20-2005 - 12:42am |
Ok Me and my boyfriend decided to try me on top this time but when I did it it was excruciating pain I couldn't enjoy myself b/c I was in so much pain. Is this normal and is there a technique to doing this?
But then again it had been three months since we last did it and it was my third time doing it. Could that have had a factor in my pain?

Sex should never be painful.
Tish, can we get "normal" added to the list of words that this site bans? :)
THERE IS NO NORMAL.
Everyone is different, every couple is different, there is no magic one answer that works always for all people. I don't think there is one "answer" that works for one couple every time.
If you are in pain, you probably need to do something different -- more lubrication (natural or added), different position, etc. A very small difference in position can cause huge changes in angles where it counts, sliding an inch one way or another could be the difference between pain and thrill for you. OR it may just be a position that doesn't work for you. My GF has physical limitations which limit our relative motion in that position -- so it just doesn't "work" for us (though it's a fun to try :).
Maybe he's too "long" and is "bottoming out" in that position (I've been told that's a very uncomfortable event. Never been an issue for me, however. :), but again, small variations in this could resolve that. You are the ones there, you are in control in that position, you need to do the experimenting to find out what is causing the problem and what you can do about it.
And yes, I've been told by a few women I've been with who had long "dry spells" before me that "first time in a while" needs to be done very carefully and slowly.
Like the others have said, pain during intercourse is not "normal". You're not going to "get through it". OK, so you can expect a bit of pain when you loose your virginity. That's not uncommon when the hymen is broken. But that's generally a one-off situation. Pain after that is never a good sign. It's telling you that something isn't going well.
As the others said, its frequently because of a lack of lubrication which can usually be fixed with extra foreplay and/or using extra lubrication. Sometimes it's from the penetration being too deep in some positions or if the guy has a big penis that "hits bottom". Other times it can be from a bacterial infection or something like thrush. Even sharp fingernails can scratch you inside too.