sex on the 1st date ?!?!?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
sex on the 1st date ?!?!?
15
Sun, 06-27-2004 - 6:18pm
Help! I am new to the board and am also new to dating after being married for 4 years. I have been trying this internet daing thing - it's going pretty good - but this morning one of my contacts who I have been chatting with for several weeks and I met for coffee. Shortly after we ended up back at my place in bed. It was amazing and I more than enjoied it...but I can't help but feel that it was a pretty slutty thing to do. Maybe I have just been out of the "real world" for too long. Please let me know what y'all think.


Thanks!

Heather

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2003
Mon, 06-28-2004 - 6:45pm
I agree Kat, and today some people are raising the standards even more due to STDs. They might wonder about someone who would be willing to have sex outside of getting tested, since some STD's like herpes are transmitted regardless of use of condoms.
Avatar for sugarbeat
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 06-28-2004 - 6:46pm
It doesn't matter if it's "slutty", it only matters how you feel about doing something like that. It's hard not having a regular sexual outlet, so things like this happen. However, you don't really know what his intentions are or what kind of person he really is. Don't confuse this encounter for the beginning of a relationship, it may evolve into a relationship but more often that's not the way these things go.

Also, even if you use condoms you are not protected against all STDs. It's up to you what risks you are willing to take.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 06-28-2004 - 10:09pm
Thank you all for your mostly positive replys! And to put you all at ease I am definitely a safety girl!!! After letting it sit for a while I realized that I am an adult and I can do what ever I want. I also realized that I am not looking for a relationship from this guy. But It was nice to hear that I am not the only erson in the world to have done this! This is just a nice destraction until a real relationship comes along! :o)

Thanks!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 3:06am
Sounds like you've managed to figure out for yourself whether you were slutty or not! :-)

Everyone has different opinions about what is slutty and what is not.

Your mother might not be impressed and you can probably guarantee that your Grandmother would have considered it wanton behaviour. But your best friends and a lot of the women here on the boards will say "Hey, you're a grownup. Whatever you want to do.".

Plenty of women might say someone that wears revealing clothing, lots of makeup and teases guys is slutty - and she hasn't actually slept with anyone!

All depends who you are listening to a lot of the time.

As far as my opinion goes? You're both adults, neither of you are cheating on anyone, why not?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 1:42pm
I think what they did is kinda slutty for both of them, but does not make them sluts. Just like she said, she's newly divorced and wants to have a little fun out there! Nothing wrong with that.

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