Sex * Education*
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| Mon, 06-21-2004 - 8:41am |
I lost my virginity at 17 to a jerk who I let control me. I let him do things to me that I now wish I had not. Like a lot of young girls, I confused sex with love and got really burned. 14 sex partners later, I was unable to have an orgasm with a man, only masterbating. It wasn't until after 2 or three years of marriage that I was able to orgasm through oral sex. Now it's no problem to come 2 or 3 times a go that way.
I'm looking back and wondering how my lack of useful information could have changed my attitude about sex. If I respected myself better, I wouldn't have torn through relationship after relationship and maybe my thoughts about my own sexuality would be more positive and less self sacrificing. I'm wondering how many of those relationships were doomed because of my screwed up views about sex.
What was your "education" like growing up? Do you think it had any good or bad effects on your sex life now?

anyway, I have vowed to be more open with my girls about sex. Not telling them everything I've done, but telling them it's much better to wait and find someone who cares about how it feels to you. I don't want them hurting men like I did.
I suppose my struggles will benefit my girls in the long run.
Of course, looking back, I have regrets about my behavior, but the past is the past, and I can't change it. I know I will make sure my children have more of an education and feel open to talk to me about it.