Sex still hurts me

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2003
Sex still hurts me
5
Tue, 07-19-2005 - 11:13pm
I am 37 years old and have a 20-month-old son. (by C-section) Conceiving him was no fun, either. My DH and I would like a second child, but to me the sex is torture and I just want to get PG ASAP cause it's so uncomfortable for me! Even if it doesn't hurt, it just doesn't feel good and sometimes there's burning afterwards. I don't know if it's the friction, the lube (which I HAVE to use!) or stress. Does anyone else out there still feel like a virgin? (and not in a good way?)
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Tue, 07-19-2005 - 11:48pm
At 37 I'm going to assume that you've been sexual active for close to 17 years or more. Has it always been like this? Have you talked to a doctor about this?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Wed, 07-20-2005 - 7:08am
I have the same questions as Westie.

bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2003
Wed, 07-20-2005 - 10:08pm
I was 21 the first time I "did it." (no penetration) With the boyfriend after that, (now my husband) I was 24 and once was able to get it all the way in. (I don't remember, cause it was so many years ago, but I don't remember it being this painful) I don't consider myself sexually active, cause my husband and I don't "do it" regularly. I'm wondering if that's why it hurts. One OB-GYN said I was nervous, my current one offered me a dilator, which I have no idea what it is. (similar to a dildo?) I plan on making an appointment soon, cause if I don't get PG again, I will want to get checked out.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 7:52am

Did either of your doctors mention Vaginismus since one said it's caused by you being nervous and the other suggested a dilator?


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 10:56am

I don't have solid at all, amym, but I'm hoping my questions will spark some ideas for others to respond on that may help ya.

20 month old?, VERY stressful. That stress alone is enough to cause intercourse to be uncomfortable for many women out there, you just may be one of them. I wonder if you enjoy sex anymore BEFORE the intercourse begins. Understanding of course that lube is primarily a physical and not necessarily a for you being naturally comfortable and ready/eager for intercourse. Something to be mindful of, often overlooked, so I don't feel bad raising reminder of it for anyone who can benefit.

For all you know, there just might be some more experience on the Sexual Health message board that can help you with this too:

http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-bhgensex

Please keep us posted, never know if one of the readers around here could benefit.

 

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